Friday, June 27, 2014

HAVING A 'SEXUAL ABUSE' TALK WITH MY 5 YEAR OLD

Awesome morning it is!

It's feels good when you know that to an extent your kids have a certain knowledge about important issues. I try as much as possible to always communicate important events to them, breaking all the details down as much as possible. It hurts me when some parents hide certain information and facts from their kids, simply because they feel that they are too young to understand these things or "They shouldn't be exposed to such words or some information". Let me seize this opportunity to inform you that you as parents, do them more harm than good. #IgnoranceIsCertainlyNotBliss

I was helping my 5year old with her bath when I noticed the way she moved as soon as I tried washing her 'private area'.
 So I asked,"Has anyone been touching you there?" 
She nodded and of course I asked again with a slight frown on my face "Who?" 
"The Sponge!" she blurted. Her siblings and I laughed pretty hard.
"But Mummy, do you honestly think someone would have the guts to touch her there?!" asked my 9 year old. 
No I didn't think anyone would or could touch her 'there' but there are possibilities. 
 Somehow, I was expecting a silly answer from my 5 year old, because if someone really had been 'invading her privacy', I would have known and besides this is a 'topic' we address almost all the time, so much so that my kids could give a lecture on it! 

So, for peace of mind sake and safety reasons, I just thought we should brush up on the topic again!
Me: So Sweetheart, would you allow anyone touch your vagina?
Fore: Nooo O! (with a horrid look on her face)
Me: What will you do if someone insists on touching your vagina?
Fore: I will say No or I will run away or even scream out loud! (with a grin on her face)
Me: What if he uses sweets or biscuits to beg you to allow him to touch your vagina?
Fore: Nooo! What sorts of sweets?! I don't need his dirty sweets! You and Daddy buy me anything I want!
Me: Good! But what if he threatens you? What if he says stuff like "I'll kill you" or "I'll kill your Mummy and your Daddy if you tell them"
Fore: I will still tell you now because I know he can't do anything. He is only saying stuff like that because he wants me to be afraid!
Me: What if he tries to force himself on you? Will you just stand there and be looking?
Fore: Nope! I'll just aim for his balls! 
Me: Yeah! Hi-five babe!

And that was the end of our discussion. Of course I left the other bits we have talked about in the past which include:
- The likely offenders of sexual abuse (It is almost always people who the children know and trust)
- Places and things the children should avoid going to and doing like the girl going to call the driver in the boys quarters, sitting on people's laps, etc
- Other methods of saving themselves from being sexually violated.

My people, things are happening O! This is not the time to be doing 'Holy holy'  or 'spiri'. Tell your kids the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Kids are actually smarter than we know it!


#BringBackOurGirls

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