I was listening to an episode of 'The Talk' Show where some of the hostesses said they would invest in good friendship because according to them, "Men come and go but friends will always be there". While one woman said that, she would rather invest in her marriage because her husband is supposed to be her best friend who in actual sense, shouldn't hurt her. And in investing in her marriage, she is also nurturing it to become even better and stronger...till death do them part! *Oh, how romantic, but sweetheart, that is not always the case*
For me, I would say to you guys, invest in whatever makes you happy. One man's meat could be another man's poison. Because one works for you, doesn't mean it should or can work for the other person. REMEMBER, THE KEY WORD IS HAPPINESS.
I am not ready to die for any man who doesn't bring me joy at all levels...spiritually, emotionally and financially (especially financially!) *covering my eyes in shame* There are some marriages that are not worth investing in while there are some that have hope of salvaging. Now, if you are in one where there is no hope, then you can invest in good friendship. Remember, it is that same friendship which you thought you could find in marriage that you are looking for! You need a friend who can share your joys and sorrows with, someone who can build your self-esteem and not bring you down at every given opportunity. It is that same friendship that can give that 'hopeless' marriage a flicker of hope.
But in investing in friendship, one has to be extremely careful! Your choice of friends matter. You will definitely need the Holy Spirit to be your guide. Some are just plain evil and can destroy your marriage. I have witnessed one where a supposed friend escorted her married friend out of her marriage for an extremely trivial reason! And when this married friend came back to pick her remaining things from the house, she met her so-called friend preparing a meal for her husband in her own kitchen!
Also, you know now...women have a lot of drama...can't deal! I would rather concentrate on my man than my female friends who have a lot of drama. Sometimes, I think I understand what some men go through in their marriages. Female friendship?! Kai! It can be too much work! Friendship is meant to be effortless, relaxing, soothing and most of all trusting.
So, all in all, invest in the one that makes you HAPPY!
I disagree with you on the part that there are "hopeless marriage".no marriage is hopeless or rather seen hopeless situation turning out to be d best and you need just one tool,God.I'd rather invest in my marriage no mata how it is cos no situation or condition is ever smooth n rosy.God didn't also promise us a smooth voyage as xtain,there are lots of examples if hope.am investing in my marriage Cos I see my husband more than just a husband,he is my brother, then husband,friend,companion,confidantn alot more.
ReplyDeleteI understand where NHW is coming from. Some marriages are so bad that the husband who is supposed to be your friend is hardly available. In my marriage for instance, my husband spends most of his time outside the home which means we hardly spend quality time together which has left me lonely though married which isn't a good place to be to be honest. So really I think it's best investing in what makes you happy and in sure all married people would rather invest in their marriage. As that's what would make them ultimately happy but in some cases of hopelessness, invest in food friendship of you have the energy :)
ReplyDeleteIn all though, I think the best friend to really have and invest time in is Jesus. He's the only one that can turn a hopeless marriage around and won't discuss you with other friends behind your back or worse still destroy your marriage to take over your husband. "What a friend we have in Jesus" singing cheerfully
ReplyDeleteIn my candid opinion,i think it makes a lot of sense to invest not only in ur marriage but ur family especially ur kids. As for marriages,nobody has a perfect one. We all experience a little hiccup every now and then. On the long run,our family with strong emphasis on the children should be our ultimate priorities. As for friendship,there still a few good friends out there who add value to our lives just as we have those who are two-faced. All we need to do is to ask God for the grace to be able discern. May God help us all!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you guys, but you see, you just have to choose what best suits situation at that point in time. For anonymous 9:39, you benefit from a solid friendship, that could possibly help you work out a solution for your 'absentee' husband (if I am allowed to use that term)
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