THE PRAYING FAMILY

Have you ever heard of the phrase,"A family that prays together stays together"? I learnt that phrase from my mother and now that I am married with children, the phrase makes a lot of sense. 

Since i got married to my husband, I have observed that the devil does not like union especially one blessed by God. In the 1st 5years of one's marriage, the devil continuously looks for ways to penetrate the home and is never at rest. The devil's mission is to scatter what God has put together. My sisters in-Christ, I am writing this piece to assure you that the devil has failed and will continue to fail if and only if you invite God into your home. 

I remember in the 1st year of my marriage, money wanted to be an issue in our lives. An amount as little as N500 to cook or as pocket money will cause problems between me and my husband. But we managed to pray our way out. This same money issue almost made me live my matrimonial home and that is when I had my first encounter with an angel. That morning, my husband had refused to drop a certain amount of money for the family and me I was fed up with his constant excuses of not having enough. So I decided to leave the marriage and he told me that if I left I shouldn't bother coming back! ( Can you imagine, that was the devil's handiwork and the fool was almost succeeding). 

I got to the office that morning and that was after I had moved my daughter and properties back to my parents' house. I am not in the usual habit of discussing my marital squabbles with my colleagues at work. So, I went on as if it were a normal day like the previous ones. An hour later, a woman walked into the office and I beckoned for her to sit down. I thought she had come to see my MD. Instead, this woman looked me in the eyes and said, "Go back home". I was shocked to hear that from her since I hadn't met her in my life. She noticed I was wondering how she knew because I had not discussed anything with anyone. "Go back. They are trying to push you out! If you don't go back, then you have been defeated", she went on to say. " Are you a Christian?" "Yes", I replied. "When you get home, pray in every corner of your house and sprinkle Holy Water around. And lastly, never leave your home for things you can resolve", the lady said. I thanked her and that was the last I ever saw of her. She hadn't even come to see the MD as I had initially thought. Immediately, I left the office to call my husband and to my utmost surprise, he answered me calmly. I asked him when he would be home and he said soon. 

I did exactly as the lady had instructed and when my husband got back, I didn't allow him to say a word until we had both prayed joining our hands together. Till date, I don't know where that ill wind that almost destroyed my home came from, if not for prayer. 

I know sometimes its difficult to pray together as a family due to work schedule or the fact that you may have a spiritually lazy spouse. It is still important to ensure that the bond in the family is not broken by still making time out to pray even if it is once a week or while driving the kids to school.

Some families think that the devil in their villages maybe the ones holding back their progress or the happiness in their homes but it is actually them who have refused to invite God into their homes.

A home that has God in it is like the 'Model Home' that everyone wishes to have or imbibe. They sail through problems without the whole world knowing. God protects them from evil and sickness. They are always happy despite their adversities. 

So therefore, I implore all my sisters in-Christ, no matter the situation or condition, please take time to pray with your family. Stay blessed.

N.B. Please send your stories to naijahousewife@gmail.com. Follow us on twitter@naijahousewife.

THE 'WAITING' ROOM

The 'Waiting Room'! I have always heard those words growing up as a child but I never in my wildest dream ever thought I would be in it and back! Yes O! I was in the queue for 3 years until God decided to answer me.

Let me give you a graphic imagination of what the waiting room is like: I would liken it to a doctor's consultation room where while you are consulting with your doctor, another patient interrupts. The doctor puts you on hold so as to attend to the patient that just came in. That is how it is when you wait for many years for God to bless you with the fruit of the womb and then you ask "How is it that God chooses to answer some people faster than the other?" Is it because they pray more? I don't think so. I think God in His infinite goodness knows our different situation and therefore answers us accordingly.

I am such a person whom God chose to answer faster than others who had been waiting for more than donkey years. God is indeed awesome. Sometimes, I look at my children and can't believe they are mine.

You see, in those I waited in the 'waiting room', I learnt a lot about God. And I think that was what God wanted from me. He wanted me and my husband to love Him unconditionally. He had put my faith to the test and I passed with flying colors( I guess:-) ). God wanted to know if I would still love Him and serve Him despite not having children. 

While I and my husband waited, our marriage was threatened. We would have countless baseless arguments and quarrels, looking for who to blame for our present situation, even though the doctors had told us we were perfectly okay. At a time, my husband wanted to blame for the abortions I had carried out in my youthful days and I wanted to blame him for the numerous women he had dealings with in the past. We had a lot of interferences, ranging from his mother to my mother, his female siblings, our close friends. It seemed as if we were been monitored! But you see, these people meant no harm but showed their concern in their own funny way, hurting us unknowingly.

Going for naming ceremonies...OMG! These were the hardest. We would leave the party earlier than normal so as to mask our sadness. At a point, we stopped going. It seemed as if we were jealous (yeah, maybe a teeny-weeny bit). 

I remember those nights that I and my husband would cry out to God in pain and anguish, asking for His mercy. But still God did not answer us! 

The craziest thing I and my husband had ever planned to do while waiting was to go out of our marriage and test our fertility. Yes O! The temptation was there but our faith did not allow us do it. We knew the punishment from God will be worse than what we were facing. So we didn't try Him. We have had friends that have suggested to take us to seek spiritual help ( if you know what I mean). Our level of desperation was so high that we were ready to do anything to have that child. 

By the end of the 2nd year of our marriage, we had almost given up the hope of ever having our child. The thought of adopting a child as suggested by some friends, was out rightly repulsive ( can you imagine, I detested the thought of taking care of God's own child and yet I wanted him to give us ours). 

Sometimes, as Christians, we need to slow down and ask God what He really wants from us because I believe everyone has a purpose on earth. But man in his selfish pursuit of what he wants is not interested in consulting with God first.

During the period of my being in the 'waiting room', God showed me different people in similar situation... Searching for child and during this time, I learnt a number of life lessons.

I met a family who had just loved a beloved wife of their son. They had been married for about 11years without child. God finally answered them but their joy was soon short lived because his and the unborn child never lived to see the light of day. I asked God if it was not His will for the woman to get pregnant talk less of having a child. Did the woman bother God so much that God eventually gave into her demands knowing the implication of her request? At that point, I decided to let God's will be done. LESSON NO 1. 

I met another couple who had been looking for a child for 8 years. We were 2 other couples gisting when our counsellor asked one odd question, "All of you looking for children, if God gave you a retarded child, would you accept?" Immediately, other couples rejected it saying "God-forbid". But how can God forbid his own child?!  I didn't reply because that was food for thought. We all want children but we don't want abnormal ones. Every child was created for a purpose but only God knows that purpose. Every child is a gift from God. Every child is a blessing from God. LESSON NO 2   

Finally, I met another couple who had been married for 15years and no child. They finally agreed to adopt a daughter. Guess what? Within 1 year of adoption, the couple had their very first own child! God must have smiled at the steps they took in adopting a child and decided to use that child to bless them with their own. Adoption is a sure test of unconditional love. LESSON NO 3 learnt.

Everyone has an experience to share when it comes to 'Tales of Infertility' but one thing I and my husband have been able to gather from ours is that it is definitely a true test of one's faith in God. It is a journey that could make or mar your relationship with God. You will see the face of God. 

I end my story by asking couples in the 'waiting room' the same questions we were asked," Are you saying you cannot love each other without the icing on the cake which is the baby? Is the thought of adoption so bad you wouldn't even consider it?"

The same God who gave me 2 beautiful kids will also do the same for you. Amen. 

N.B : please send your stories to naijahousewife@gmail.com. You can now follow us on twitter@naijahousewife.

FEEDING ALLOWANCE

I have a very stubborn husband. He has refused to upgrade this feeding money. Since we got married 7 yrs ago, it is the same N5,000 he started with that he is still giving up till today.

I mentioned this problem to my friend and she laughed at me calling me a fool. "So you are telling me that each time he gives u that kind of money, you actually collect it!", she says with sarcasm. Of course I do or you want my kids to starve? She looks at me in dismay. "So you want to tell me that all these delicacies you give him day in day out for a whole month amounts to N5,000?" ....You know this my friend has a point. I am sure in my husband's mind, he thinks I have a lot of money since I never complain. And to make matters worse or worst sef, the kind of soup I give him contains all you can imagine, all in the name of making your husband happy. How about me the spender?! May be he thinks foodstuffs are priced at N1 each.

My friend tells me how she feeds her  husband according to how much he leaves. I asked her, "Then what happens to the remaining days?". "Dry fasting naa ni!". Aah! "Yes ke! When he is tired of fasting, he then brings out money! Meanwhile, I make sure my kids are well taken care of during that time. And when I know he is almost home, I set them in the parlour and tell them to put on hungry faces!". This my friend you are harsh. She tells me that that is the only way they will learn. How many things will a woman do?

My God I have to be sharp. Now I have decided to ignore repairing any appliance in the house.

Even if we decide to do it 50/50...I know the husband I married, he will still cheat me and leave me half way to continue feeding the house.

Please I want to ask one question. Why is it that when some husbands notice their wives have a regular source of income, they shy away from their duties of providing money for the family's upkeep.

N.B. Pls send your stories to naijahousewife@gmail.com
Twitter@naijahousewife

AMERICANAH HUSBAND

Lol! Wonders will never stop ceasing! Have you guys ever heard of the word 'American Wonder'? My friend is a real life American wonder! How can women be so gullible! Anyways I have concluded that it only happens to greedy people. I am sure you are wondering what I am ranting about...

I have this friend, a really good one for that matter. She is sooo nice and supposedly gentle. But what I don't like about her is that she gets easily swayed!  She has been single for a long-time until one guy came from no where ( actually from her town...she is from Delta state). Actually, he didn't come from no-where *wink*. Her uncle who resides in Lagos introduced the guy to her. The guy is supposed to be an Engineer who is based in America and who came back 'home' to look for a wife. He claimed that there is no wife-material in America.

As soon as Uche my friend heard the word 'America', she became interested. She started acting like a desperado and I think that was what the man preyed on.

Uche was about 30years old when she met and married the guy. They stayed together in Nigeria as husband and wife for a good 2 or 3months until the guy said he was going back to process her papers and then come back for her.

Like joke like joke, Uche hasn't set eyes on her husband for over 5years now! They kept in touch after he left for about 1 year, until he became incommunicado!  Uche please go and remarry, she will say No! Uche, ok have a boyfriend to be servicing the 'area', she will say No!

How can a man be this callous and keep a woman waiting for years! And how can my friend be so stupid and not read the writing on the wall. If anyone ever told me that my friend would be a victim of this criminal behavior, I would never have believed it.

The gist has not ended. We heard from the grapevine in her village that the guy was in touch with his own people who had been claiming all this while that they hadn't heard from him. This said husband of hers was married to a white woman and they had 4grown-up children together. The annoying part is that he doesn't even send her money and we hear that he is comfortable!  I am sure that uncle of hers knows about all this even before the plan was carried out! And I am sure he was settled big time! Na him pave way for the arrangement na!

You know what my friend is doing now? Because I am beginning to think that this whole marriage thing is affecting her behaviour. She doesn't take care of herself anymore. She has joined these S.U people to become born-again again! So you can imagine her appearance. How can a man be attracted to such a person especially if she has to remarry?! She has started fasting and praying for her husband to come back.

I don't get this girl! How can you be praying for a husband that is not yours to come back to you! Are you for real Uche?! Or that God should give you your own husband! Please, she should stop deceiving herself there...I know she still wants him because he stays in America and she has hopes of going there! It's not a bad idea to go there O but to tie that ambition to someone else is what I can't get!

Please fellow sisters,  advice your sister!  I believe the earlier she starts the divorce process, the better for her so that she can settle down as she is still young!  Sebi, she don qualify to apply for divorce!

MUCH ADO ABOUT THE MALE CHILD

Na wah O! I am still trying to understand all the fuss about having a male child. I used to think it was peculiar to a particular tribe in Nigeria (the IBOs) but I see that the YORUBAs have been infected with the 'plague'!
You will see some women who are ready to go ten rounds of pregnancy looking for a male child even if it kills them. Isn't this ridiculous?! I used to think also that the husbands were to be blamed for forcing their wives to search for that male child but it's not all husbands that do that. Infact, most husbands don't care if they have only girls. It's the women that put themselves on that 'suicide' mission.

There was one time when I was pregnant for my 1st child and I had to go for an ultrasound scan. While I was waiting for my turn, we heard cries for help from the aides in the scan room. We expectant mothers rushed in to see what could have gone wrong. Lo and behold, a woman had fainted after she was told she was having a girl child. Even though that was going to be her 6th girl! (Yikes! Another suicide mission!)...Ehen! What's wrong with having girls?!...but 6! Mehn!

Another one that happened when I was in labour room trying to push out my first. My fellow labour-room partner who also was in labour was gisting me how she had 3 girls already and was hoping this 4th one would be a boy. She was so sure it would be a boy. I asked her how she knew, she said because the pregnancy was different from her previous and besides she had fasted and prayed 50days prayer. Her God never fails. Oya now! Time to push pikin reach...na girl O! Come and see drama! Those nurses are wicked sha! They already knew the woman's gist and out of mischief they told her husband to bring clothes for the baby. All the clothes were blue! When he found out it was a girl, he bust into the labour-room and warned the wife not to bother coming back home especially with the baby! Na so the man abandon wife all because of this same male child issue.

The one that pained me most was this stupid wife that suggested her husband should impregnate his 17year old daughter rather than marry another wife. And the old fool did so that he could have the male child he had always wanted.

My friend was telling me how her mother-in-law was asking her friend to pray for her so that God will provide her with a grandchild! Her friend looked at her in dismay and said, "But you have grandchildren now Mama Ebuks!" My mother-in-law hissed at her and retorted, "Which grandchildren, all those girls? I don't have any grandchild yet until Ebuka gives me a grandson!" Abeg, the old witch should hurry and die fast, her mates are in heaven or hell as her case maybe. Tell me, is that right?

Have you noticed also that if a woman wants to deliver in a private hospital, it costs more when you have a baby boy than it would a baby girl !... as if! Even when you want to adopt, it costs more to adopt a baby boy than a girl. Check out the price tag on the male child!

The last but not the least story is my uncle who had 8 girls from his 1st wife and wanted to marry another one. The family begged and pleaded with him not to. He insisted on going ahead with the marriage. After the 2nd wife gave him 2 extra girls, no one begged him to stop. Lol! Now he is burdened with 10 girls.

So I urge everyone who has a child, whether male or female, to love their child. The touts, armed robbers and corrupt leaders who are men...are they not the same male child people still kill themselves for. Women please wise up and accept what ever child God has blessed you with. Keep yourselves alive to take care of your child. Stop hiding behind culture and using your husbands as excuse. There are female leaders who are making their parents proud...the same rejected female children.


N.B: Please send your stories to naijahousewife@gmail.com. Your names will not be published.

THE OTHER WOMAN

Just the other day, my aunt referred a young lady to me for counseling. The minute she walked into my office,   I could tell what the problem was. She had that LOOK! The look that any other woman would have if there was a problem in her home or marriage. And what struck me most was how young and naive she looked. Or was it her inexperience that made her appear so young and painfully naive?

I implored her to take a seat and of cos asked her what the problem was. Of cos she replied "Nothing". "Oh pulizz!  You mean Aunty brought you here to see me for nothing?!", I replied. Within few seconds that passed by, I took time to study her...she appeared frail, worn out, disheveled. It appeared she hadn't been sleeping. Eeyah, what a pretty girl and she could do better with her looks. Her sobs jolted me back to reality and then her story started...

She is 28years old. She has been married for 4years now and has a son who would soon turn 3years old. She is married to a wealthy Engineer who is not only far more experienced than she is but 15 years older. She is and has always been a full-time housewife (I use the term 'Housewife' as she no get any other handwork. 'Home-maker' is the term used for housewives with other handwork) since she graduated from University.

 She has been trying to get admission into a foreign university but luck hasn't been on her side. Infact, luck ran out on her when she overstayed the 4weeks she applied for in the U.K. She claims she thought the 6 months given to her was for one trip, so she stayed for 5 months (Duh?!). This left her devastated and her hopes for travelling to the U.K in the nearest future slim! Funnily, her husband who appeared to be a concerned and caring husband was ready to spend all his cash to ensure she studied abroad. And each time she didn't get the admission, he would be so upset even more than the applicant herself which left her baffled.

The 'koko' of the matter is that this husband has not slept with this young lady, his wife, since last year February , that's over a year! (Wow! I didn't know such marriages existed where sex is extinct!). Infact, the year before last, he only made love to her thrice. I asked if she had confronted him about it and she said 'Yes'. Then "What was his reply?", I had to ask. "Nothing", she replied. She says that's not even all, that she saw evidences that he cheating on her with another woman. When she confronted him about it, he got really upset and she ended up apologizing to him! What the F@#*k?! Words cannot express how pissed I was with her.

She moved out of the house when she noticed that he wasn't ready to change his ways. I asked whether he came to get her from wherever she went and she replies no. So how did you resolve te matter?h She moved back to the house after some months and while she was away, her husband did not bother to call or even visit her. The sad part is that nothing has changed since she moved in or when she reported the matter to his parents. So right now she is frustrated.

Well I had heard enough. I asked her one question "Do you pray with your husband?". I wasn't surprised when she said "No". What people don't know is that "A family that prays together stays together". God is the one that builds and sustains the institution called 'Marriage'. Without God in a home, there will be cracks large enough for the devil to enter thereby causing havoc.

Secondly, I don't understand why a spouse would decide to leave the matrimonial home when there is a quarrel! You do all your quarreling in the confines of your bedroom, infact the bed. You must never leave your home. That is exactly what the devil wants.

Thirdly, as a woman, you must continue to look for ways to refine yourself, academically, spiritually fashionly. You must always look groomed and trendy admist adversities. You must improve on your self-image and self-worth. If you don't know how, visit a clinical psychologist today.

Fourthly, do not concern yourself about the 'other woman'. She is not important. God will deal with her in His own time.

Finally, you must never give up or lose hope or faith in your marriage. Successful marriages go through trials and tribulations

This I told her and many more. I told her she needs to go and rebuild herself inside and outside in order to fight to keep her home.

May God be with us in our homes. Amen


N.B  If you have an experience you would like to share, please send your story to naijahousewife@gmail.com

WHAT NIGERIAN HUSBANDS WANT!

After so much thought, deep one for that matter, I have come to a conclusion that a typical Nigerian husband wants a M-U-M-U wife a.k.a Olodo wife a.k.a itiboribo wife a.k.a deaf-and-dumb wife a.k.a see-evil-but-no-talk-am wife a.k.a....the list is endless! Some of you fellow wives may be fast to say, "No O! Not my husband". Wait before you start arguing, let me ask you one question, "For you to enjoy your marriage, how did you as a wife need to behave or talk?" Are you enjoying the peace and tranquility of your home because you argued with your husband? Or are you enjoying your home because you nag when he does funny stuff like smoking in front of the kids or coming home drunk? Seriously, just think about it. So you don't know it's because you 'behave' well.

Lemme give you a solid example. I was lying down on my bed pretending to sleep when suddenly it occurred to me that i hadn't done my routine check on my husband's phone. So I reached out to get it where it was beside him(he had fallen asleep...deeply asleep. Trust me I know cos he was snoring *wink*). First, I scrolled through his contacts...nothing! Secondly, his messages...Ah Haa! Those funny text messages from those 'home-destroyers'! I still dug deeper into his BBM (Blackberry Messenger)...I see more 'home-destroyers'! I move to his facebook inbox....Holy Christ! More conversations with 'Home-destroyers'! You may ask, "What did I then do?" Lemme answer you, "Nothing". Yes O! Nothing! So you expect me to use all these information and confront him abi? You see, if I had done that, he would have accused me of invading his privacy. Or I would have given him hell and then he will say his wife nags so therefore he needs to cool his head in another woman's laps! Or I would have given him reason to distrust me and then he will become extremely careful ( which is what I don't want...I need to know who my rivals are. Not that I will fight them O!) with how he leaves his personal items. So after all these findings, I keep quiet. Is this not a M-U-M-U behaviour?!

Another example is that when I and my husband quarrel, and he is at fault O! He will not apologize verbally or even act like he is remorseful, at night when we are about to sleep, he prepares to enter the 'place'. He is not even planning to discuss the issue at hand or even send your feelings. If it were you, will you say 'No'?

Another M-U-M-U situation is when both of us come back from a stressful outing and he is suddenly asking me, "What is there to eat?" I never even remove shoe talkless of dropping handbbag. I look at him very stupified. (No be me and him follow comot or abi na my ghost?!) What do I do?....Nothing except to SHUT UP AND COOK!!

In some other women case (because my own still better), some husbands will tell their wives not to work. Meanwhile, in the woman's mind, she needs to work. But in this case, is it the woman that married the man or the man married the woman? So therefore, you have no choice but to obey without argument. Your happiness does not count now but what Oga at the top has said.

On a final note, if you want peace to reign, it is not everything you see you talk but you can act on it with the Wisdom of God. May God save us from M-U-M-U situations. Amen. Because one day our opinions and feelings will count in our homes and marriages.


N.B If you are a married woman and you feel like sharing your thoughts and challenges in this blog, please send your story to naijahousewife@gmail.com

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST

The 'Beauty and the Beast' I am talking about is not the one we all are familiar with. Mschew! That's right, not the Disney owned story! Please, come down from your high horses and face reality! I am talking about the 'Beauties' and the 'Beasts' living among us.

Yes, I am talking about Domestic Violence or Intimate Partner Abuse or Violence. I know you may say ..."Old or Stale gist!". It may be to you because you have never been a victim and you will never be in Jesus name. But I am speaking on behalf of the women or men (as the case may be sometimes) who are victims and cannot find their way out. 

I want to use this medium to say  a very big shame to all those 'Beasts'! Only God will judge you. 

Just yesterday, my wounds that are still trying to heal from my own situation re-opened yesterday. I was called  at about 11pm  yesterday night to come and identify a patient brought in via emergency at a private hospital in Lagos. The caller refused to give me further details on the condition of the patient but either ways, I still rushed to the place. Just hearing the word 'Hospital' got me worried.

On getting there, you won't believe who I saw lying half dead at the entrance covered in blood from head to toe! (Oh my God) with her limbs looking out of place! It was my friend Onyinye, my best friend of almost 20years if I am correct. Hmmm....this my friend has been married to a 'Beast' for about 10years now. She is a real beauty who is a victim of domestic violence, is it physical? Is it verbal or emotional abuse? She dey there. Infact, she is a PhD and Masters degree holder in domestic violence.

I have tried times without number to warn her to leave that Beast of a husband, like I did mine but she kept say, "God will intervene". Does God wish for anyone to die a premature death? It is because God knew her time on earth isn't over, that is why He spared her life from this last one that landed her in emergency room.

According to Onyinye's neighbour, Mrs Madu, she(Mrs Madu) and her husband had noticed that the quarrel between Onyinye and and her husband had lasted longer than normal that day. And it started because Onyinye who is a graduate of Economics from a Federal University just got a job and thought she should inform her husband. She has never worked since she got married 10years ago because her 'Beast' told her not to. She obeyed thinking it was even better so as to give her time to take care of the home front. Since the the last  child of 3 children was 6years old, it only made sense for her to get a job and add to the income of the house. She also thought it will reduce her 'Beast' using her as a 'punching bag' which she thought might be out of financial frustrations.

As soon as Onyinye told her 'Beast', all hell let loose. Her 'Beast' started reigning abuses at her calling her all sorts of names. While abusing her, he was also slapping  and beating her. It was when she was falling over things in the house that got the attention of Mr and Mrs Madu who rushed to their flat on the ground floor. And when that her 'Beast' is dealing with her that he locks all doors knowing fully well that neighbours would try to intervene. All efforts to get the 'Beast' to open the door for them proved abortive so they decided to plead with him through the curtains of their living room. Mrs Madu said she could see Onyinye running from room to room trying to save her dear life. At about that time, it was past 8am. Their children hadn't left for school. After much pleading, Mr Madu decided to use the children being late as an excuse for the 'Beast' to leave his wife . With that, Mr and Mrs Madu left Onyi to her fate hoping that her 'Beast' would stop.

Thirty minutes later, Mrs Madu saw Onyi's 'Beast' taking the kids to school. She rushed down immediately to the flat so that she could talk to Onyi. She said she knocked and pleaded with Onyi to open the door, but she got no response. She finally gave up and went back to her flat but kept a close watch for her. It was about 8pm in the evening, she noticed there was no sign of the husband, children and even Onyi. She got worried and beckoned to her husband to escort her to Onyi's flat. They knocked ferociously at the door but got no response. Just as they were about to give up, they heard a deep groan or moan in the living room that was pitch black. They broke in and found Onyi in a pool of her blood. The 'Beast' had broken her head with an object we do not know, he also fractured her 2 hands and had also made cuts on her face. 

Now my friend is lying at the hospital half dead. Her husband has absconded with her 3 children and left her to die. She called out my name in agony before she passed out. 

What I don't understand, is "When will the scales from the eyes of women who are victims fall off?" Mine fell off 2years after I got married to a Beast in Angel clothing. But, trust me, I left him with marks he will never forget. Even if he decides to remarry, he has to explain to that unfortunate wife of his what caused the big scar on his back. (Lol! After the fool thought he had dealt with me, I let him believe so. As soon as he slept off, I poured the kettle of water I had been boiling for a little over 2hours on his back....Oh! That day I felt victorious! I relieve those moments over and over again in my mind). 

See me today, I am alive and shining and even enjoying my kids. I will have to keep fighting for Onyi until gets herself. Please join me and pray for her.

As for the victims of Domestic Violence, I urge you to save yourselves now because tomorrow you might never get the chance to. May God give you the wisdom and grace to make the right decisions. Amen.