Friday, November 1, 2013

MY MOTHER IN-LAW IS INTERFERRING IN MY MARRIAGE

I got this from SDK's blog and thought I should share it.

Hi Stella,Hope you are doing OK. I love the good job you are doing with your blog. I need your advice and that of your readers.

I have been married for 10yrs and i love my husband very much. The problem is that his mother keeps meddling in ourhome and causing problems but so far the issues never got out of hand thank God!

The one that is giving me heart ache now is that she told my husband that our kids school fees was too much and my husband agreed with her and asked that the kids ages 8,6 and 4 be put in a cheaper school their reason being that my husband and his siblings went to public schools.

Stella i also went to public school but the public school of our days are different from today's public school.

Our kids used to go to school that one person's school fees was 150k a term. My husband told me he was not going to pay more than 50k for a child anymore after the mum came up with how he was paying too much.

I had to call her and talk to her and gave her reasons why public school was a no no. She then suggested cheaper schools. How she got to know how much we were paying for sch fees, i don't know.

All these happenedbefore the new sch term started. I decided to obey my husband since i saw that he was serious.  The cheapest nicest sch i found was 85k which he agreed to pay.

My husband makes over 1million a month,i earn 250k a month and my contributionis to feed the family, every other expense except food is taken care of by hubby.

 We live in a rented apartmentalthough we are building. the house my mother in law lives in was built by my husband 3yrs ago. Anytime he is doing stuff for his people i don't interfere meanwhile he is no 3 out of 5 children but the only one doing well.

Now the issue i have is that since my kids started attending this new school my 8yrs old daughter comes home saying waka! ntooo!bastard! i just can't deal its driving me nuts. I asked their dad if he was okay with all these grammar our child is using and he toldme to keep correcting her. 

I didn't use my money to buy food this month but asked him for money because I'm saving to changethem back to the school they were before but i don't know if i can continue like this or if i want to be the one paying for our kids school fees.

I am an American citizen and i am honestly thinking of eloping with my kids but i don't want to break my marriage bythis action.My sister in America is advising i  come this Xmas with my kids. i have already gotten them visas it will be easy to file for them when we are there but seriously i don't know if its a wise thing to do and i don't want to threaten my husband withthis cos I'm not sure what his reaction would be. I have been praying for him to have a change of heart i don't know how long mypatience can hold. 

I really need Ur advice. Thanks


Culled from SDK's blog

1 comment:

  1. excuse me o!
    You beta not break ur marriage ova such a stupid mata. Haba, it is heart breaking, yes... but definitely not marriage breaking, naa.
    I suggest you calm down and firstly, pray... seriously, pray like u neva av b4, cos it's ur kidz future here. then listen to God. sometimes we av a mindset n just want our own way. who says u got to attend an ivy league skull to be successful? wat is ur defn of success anyway?
    wateva it is, ivy league schools r no guarantee of it.
    afta pryr n listening 4 d next step, i suggest unless u hrd otherwise, you approach hubby again; with ur facts and figures. u know how men like those. besides it'll show how serious u really r. show him facts if u find it, on how schls affect ur education, etc.... then appeal to him. let him know u respect his wishes nd opinion and his mom, if need be, but that the team is really d 2 of u, b4 anyone else, he chose you cos he has good taste, so he shld be able to listen to u too.
    last, but certainly not least, don't u dare pay 4 schl fees with ur own money bcos ur hubby says d skull 2 xpensive. that's an outright act of rebellion and says to him: i don't need you!
    you need him and he, you. you can work this thing out. you beta not listen to those stupid friendz who r advising u otherwise.... they're just jealous o, or else, like i said b4; stupid.
    no be u talk sy na only ur hubby dey do fine for him mama pikin?
    ehn hen naa, y dem no go wan spoil tinz.
    my dear, wise up. if him no gree, beta take your own home tutoring more seriously, then also get them lesson teacher at home, organise extra curricular activities e,g, swimming, languages, theatre, etc.... if he complain; tell him thet don't offer it at d new schl. by the time he realises he is paying 300k for education instd of d former 80k, nobody go tell am wat to do...... hee! hee!
    one more thing, i hope this is also not a class thing 4 u... u kno, keeping up wit d Joneses' some schls are just plain elitist n ppl who can't afford it r killing demselves wit debt to get in, wen dere r perfectly ok cheape sklls around.
    shalom.

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