O my goodness gracious, the moment we've all(well, I've) been waiting for!
Naijahousewife has decided to take our meeting point to another level. We can now have interactive sessions on 'asknaijahousewife' channel on BBM.
You don't want to join the discussions but just want to ask private questions on marital issues or relationships, it's okay...just add me on BBM (PIN: 7E0CB71F )
Don't miss out on the hot topics!
'asknaijahousewife' channel...The place to bare your mind!
Waiting for your requests...don't dull!
A lot of husbands have different ways of reacting to certain marital issues, especially when it comes to duties their wives have to perform.
One of the duties most Nigerian husbands quarrel about with their wives is COOKING! Whether or not their wives can cook and how frequently it's being prepared. On a good day, you should feel sorry for any woman who can neither cook nor provide meals for her husband frequently. Right?...wrong! Our veteran actor, Mr Olu Jacobs, has just proven us wrong, especially when his wife, who is also a veteran actress, Joke Silva, gushed about her marriage. Read what she said...
"I have never lied about this, I have never been 'a doing the cooking kind of woman'. When my husband met me, he knew. He was the one who used to do the cooking because he is good at it. I used to do the cooking when I felt like. Sometimes, it comes out to be a huge success and sometimes a failure. Some years ago, I cooked vegetables and it was terrible and my husband is such a gem, he ate it like that. It is not as if my mum didn't teach me.
For my husband, cooking is a therapy and for me it is a chore and yet he will always tell you that I look after him so much, I do that in other ways. We have somebody who does the cooking. I have taught them to cook the way I like and we have people who do the general cleaning."
The guy na rare gem. All you traditionalist husband, emulate. For now, Mr Olu Jacobs remains your role model! *Hehehe*
Good morning peeps! Top of the morning to y'all!
You know, when I said one time that it was quite a task staying married to a traditional Nigerian man, people sent me mails disproving what I said, and as shocking as it may seem, mostly women sent me those mails! Some women even gave reasons why some women deserved to be beaten! Of course, I chose to ignore those mails. I still maintain, there is no partnership in Nigerian marriages.
It also excites me to share with you what the daughter of an Afrobeat star, Yeni Kuti, thinks about marriage. In her own words...
" I am still single because I have lost all interest in marriage and I don’t believe in the institution any more. Nigerian men are too controlling and overbearing for me and I am already set in my ways. Besides, I have been on my own for too long. My major concern is training my daughter.
I praise married women; I think they are the real stars of this country. Women in their husbands house looking after their husbands and children are amazing especially the ones with nine to-five jobs who come back home tired and still go to the kitchen to cook for their husbands. These are the women that women magazines should be celebrating because they are the real super women".
Thank you Yeni. Not too many Nigerian women agree with you and the reasons shouldn't be far fetched (cultural and religious factors).
Any way, do you guys agree?
You know, when I keep telling some mothers to be extra careful on how they raise their children especially the girl child, they keep saying annoying things like "It's not my portion!" Need I remind you that we are not dealing with portions here but facts?!
I have received countless of mails on physical and sexual abuse, and it hurts me to know that we still live in a "Culture of Silence" where most people have an attitude of "Let them not quote me"! Rather sad because at this rate, we will not make progress.
Read one of such mails I got...
Dear NHW,
I have decided to run to you because a friend introduced your site to me. As I write you this letter, my heart is bleeding. My husband has killed the love and trust I have for him. Please you need to help me find a solution to my problem because I don't know what to do and I don't want to fail my 6 year old daughter.
I got married to this my husband about 3 years ago and we have a 1 year old daughter together. My 4 older children are not from him, they are from my previous husband who is now in blessed memory. We all live together in a room and parlour and over the years, my husband has not given me any reason to worry. Sometimes, I leave him in the care of the kids while I go to work. My 6 year old is the last of my older children.
Recently, I noticed that my daughter's panties were always stained with foul smelling discharge which to me seemed abnormal. So I took it upon myself to give her a good bath. She normally bathes herself and I know she does it well. When I tried washing her vaginal region, she refused to open her legs. I asked her why and she said that place was paining her. The odour coming from there was to offensive that I forced her legs open and cleaned. She cried with so much pain and so I was forced to take her to the hospital.
On getting to the hospital, to my utmost surprise, the female doctor we met, started asking funny questions about the people that live with us, if my daughter has been touched by anyone. At this point, I was like who would want to touch a 6 year old, talk less of my own daughter. We may live in one room but I don't allow my kids go out anyhow O!
To cut the story short, the doctor was able to get my daughter to say who had been touching her...my own husband! She said he started with fingering her for more than 10 times at different times. He would tell her he is checking for 'something' so that she would relax and not question his actions, he being the father she has always known. The actual penetration came only recently. If you see how this monster of a husband tore my daughter's vagina, leaving her with cuts. She couldn't give me any reason why she didn't tell me.
The problem is if I confront him, he might tell me to pack out of the house. Where will I go with my 5 children. This my husband has a better salary than mine of N15,000. He helps train my kids in school. He brings money for food.
Please advice me on what to do, I am so scared and ashamed to confront the situation.
...Na wah O! My dear, you just have to confront him O! At least for your daughter's sake. You have a God that can never desert you. Your husband is not your God! He is an animal that needs to be locked up. Remember you have a daughter with him and he may do the same to her, it's only a matter of time. I know some women who have used N10, 000 and trained their children. You are not alone.
Please speak out, at least for the sake of other women.
# FamilyLifestyleModification
Good morning y'all! Another sexy day!
Today, we will be discussing all you need to know about meat and fish. It's an important topic because it affects the family as a whole. The irony of this meat issue, is that the wives overfeed their husbands with meat and leave the little ones who need it the most, out of it! #BlameitonCulture
Well, I am writing to let you know that if you are not careful, that meat can lead to your death! So to ensure that we all partake in a long and healthy life, I will help differentiate healthy meat from unhealthy ones.
There are basically 2 categories of meat:
1. Red Meat
2. White Meat
Red Meat includes everything beef. It is dark coloured meat. It ranges from adult mammal to its products such as cow, sheep, ram, beef sausage, ham, intestines, skin, etc. This kind of meat shouldn't be eaten alot. Red meat is sweet, yummy, delicious but sorry to disappoint you, it has been linked to development of cancers, heart diseases, Diabetes, obesity.
Red Meat has a lot of Disadvantages:
1. Increased saturated fat content( this type of fat damages the blood vessels causing atherosclerosis).
2. Decreased natural Trans fat ( this good fat helps reduce bad cholesterol)
3. Increased cholesterol.
White Meat includes chicken, Turkey, rabbit (people eat this), lamb, veal. This type of meat is usually white when cooked or 'pale and pink' in its uncooked state. This is really healthy. Much healthier than red meat.
Fish is in a class of its own and is the best. It contains almost everything your heart needs to stay healthy (but I am not a great fan of fish). There are different types of fish but the best is or are the 'scaly' ones. There is so much noise about Catfish, whether it is healthy or not. Honestly I don't know but all I can say is that even though it does contain a bit of fat, it is still healthier than red meat.
Methods of Cooking these meat include:
1. Boiling
2. Grilling
3. Steaming
4. Roasting
5. Remember to skin the chicken before cooking it. Helps remove most of the fat content that is stored in and underneath the skin.
Did you notice that I didn't include frying? ...so don't even think it!
N.B I forgot to mention in the last post on 'Salt Intake'...No Added Salt! Meaning that after cooking, don't add salt to your food if you think "the salt didn't come out "! *hehehe*
So there, my luvlies!
The problems in Nigeria is no more a 'rude joke' as I thought initially.
How can President Jonathan allow people like this walk Scot free. After reading this excerpts from the so called Boko Haram video, it is not a time to sit down and be dulling! Prrraaaaaayyyyyy!!
What Shekau said in the video
"I am going to marry out any woman who is 12 years old, and if she is younger, I will marry her out at the age of nine, just like how my mother, Aisha, the daughter of Abubakar, was married out to Prophet Mohammad at the age of nine.
"You are all in danger, I mean all of you.
"I am the one who captured all those girls and will sell all of them. I have a market where I sell human beings because it is Allah that says I should sell human beings. Yes, I will sell women, because I sell women.
"I captured and abducted girls in a Western school, and it became a worrying issue for all of you. You have forgotten that I have said that it is not only girls' education I am against. I am against everyone who attends a Western school. Girls should go and marry.
"Slavery is allowed in my religion, and I shall capture people and make them slaves.
"Don't think we are done yet because we are not. We are on our way to Abuja and we shall also visit the South, not to look for Jonathan but to destroy the nation's refineries.
"Talking about human rights and democracy. Nonsense. People that are doing same-sex marriage and saying they are leaders.
"I will imprison Jonathan's daughter. Anyone who turns to Islam will be saved. For me, anyone that embraces Islam is my own. Stupid Jonathan, you will be surprised. Until the land is soaked with blood.
"You said you want to capture me. Surely, you will one day. But I will also haunt for Jonathan, and if I catch him, I will kill him.
"Do not think I am indispensable, I am not. Anybody can kill me. Even the smallest of creature can kill me. But when you kill me, somebody more deadly will rise, and you will cry that you will rather have me than him, just as you now say that Yusuf Mohamed is more lenient that me.
"I am a leader, I don't have any president; I am my president.
"Late Aminu Kano, Late Tafawa Balewa are not Muslims, they are all pagans. I am going to kill all the Imams and other Islamic clerics in Nigeria because they are not Muslims since they follow democracy and constitution. Senator Ali Modu Sheriff is a pagan, Senator Ali Ndume is also a pagan and they are all inclusive. I am against democracy and you should better get prepared.
"It is Allah that instructed us, until we soak the ground of Nigeria with Christian blood, and so-called Muslims contradicting Islam. [We will kill and wonder] what to do with smelling of their corpses, smelling of Obama, Bush and Jonathan. Then we will open prison and imprison the rest. Infidels have no value.
"This is a war against Christians and democracy and their constitution. Allah says we should finish them when we get them.
"In fact, you are supposed to wash and re-wash a plate Christian eats food from before you eat as Muslims. Are Christians the people we should play with? They killed us in Shendam, Zangon Katab and all the places. It is either you are with us or you are with them, and when we see you, we will harvest your neck with knife."
Lord save us from the clutches of evil and from the clutches of those coming for second term! *lips are tightly sealed and padlocked*
Good morning my lovelies! OMG! What a sexy weather we have today (all rainy and all)!
You may wonder "Why all the hype about salt and how much you and your loved ones consume?" Wonder not again. Salt intake has been directly linked to hypertension (high blood pressure), as well as stroke, heart failure, osteoporosis, stomach cancer and kidney disease. And now, it's not only adults that are affected, even children. So if you know you love yourself and your family, let's join hand and change our lifestyle, starting with the salt consumption. Charity, they say, begins at home.
The normal cooking salt which is the table salt, contains sodium chloride (NaCl), the Na being our main concern. Na increases blood pressure because it makes excess fluid to be retained in the body, thereby creating an added burden to your heart.
Na is contained in about 75% of food we eat from processed foods and foods we buy from 'Bukas' and eatries.
It may interest you to know that the American Heart Association (which is our standard) recommends a healthy daily dose of not more than 1,500mg of Na. But most people unknowingly or knowingly consume more than 3,400mg a day. You are slowly killing yourself and your family O!
Some people may ask "Can we then use Maggi/Knorr instead of ordinary salt?" I won't lie, I don't know. All I know is that, Maggi/Knorr contain salt already. So personally, I prefer to use Knorr or Maggi cubes to cook rather than table salt. To me, these are 'flavoured salt'! *Hehehe* I don't mix the two, that is, Knorr and table salt. Good salts sold in the market these days are fortified with Iodine and Vitamin A (I am not going to mention names of these good salts, since I am not being paid to do so!).
Here are a list of 'accused' foods that we and our children feast on, that contain high levels of Na, so you may want to watch the quantity you consume:
- Indomie Noodles (highly accused. Kids just love it. You may want to limit their intake of it to twice a week instead of daily)
- Smoked fish (Mothers in the house!)
- Ketchup
- Breakfast Cereals
- Potato Chips (potato not cooked in its natural state)
- sausage or bacon or ham
- canned foods in brine (Yuk! I hate brine)
But if you have 'sinned', you may want to reduce the level of Na in your body with the following healthy meals:
- Boiled sweet potato
- Green veggies
- Spinach
- Bananas, Apples, Orange
- Peas, Beans
- Tomatoes, Cucumber
- Raisins
These foods mentioned contain the mineral Potassium (k) that counteracts the effect of sodium in the body.
Now, if you want to know how to measure the amount of Na in salt, here is a guide (according to the gospel of Oyibo people) but me, I don't know how realistic or feasible this measurements are. Only God can help us!
1/4 teaspoon salt = 600mg
1/2 teaspoon salt= 1,200mg
3/4 teaspoon salt = 1,800mg
1 teaspoon salt = 2,300mg
Hian O!
Another thing we can do is to learn to read 'Nutritional Facts' food labels. If you don't know how to interpret what you read, look for people like us (We don't charge much) *smacking my lips*
Transfer that knowledge you have gained to your children or loved ones. As long as they can talk and make conversation, your children will understand.
Let's try and help ourselves O!
Remember I told you guys that I won't be saying much on the issue of Domestic Violence. I have seen that some women are highly cursed!
What I need to know from you wives who get daily dose of beating...what does it do to you? Does it turn you guys on? Is it like a prelude to hot great sex? So why the hell do you freaking remain in an abusive relationship??!!
I stumbled on this story...as usual. And the annoying thing about the whole event, is that the woman cries at the outcome of the beating! Abegi!! Save your crocodile tears. What do you expect from a mad husband?!
Look, if you are going to remain in an abusive relationship, then start learning how to fight for survival! If he beats you, don't let him go Scot free. Let him sleep, and then you attack! You have a lot of options:
1. Hot water (on any part of his body that you like)
2. Hot Oil (to fry his balls, if you like. But if you never collect pikin from his hand, don't go there...yet!)
3. Hire thugs in your area, pay them to beat him well, as in well! These are his real mates! Don't forget to collect their numbers just in case.
4. Your pestle. You fire this from a distance.
The trick is not to kill him but to leave unforgettable marks on his body! Be there to nurse him back to health for 'Round 2'!
Please read on before I get carried way *too vexed*...
A naval officer’s two children die in a fire he started accidentally while allegedly beating his wife in Lagos on Friday.
The incident involving the naval officer identified by officials of the Gbagada General Hospital simply as Udofia, took place at the Nigerian Navy Town, Ojo, Saturday PUNCH learnt.
According to a hospital official, who pleaded anonymity because she was not authorised to speak on the issue, the deceased children, Emmanuela and Michael, were aged 18 months old and five years old.
When the children were brought in here, their father, who also sustained some burn injuries, said they were electrocuted but that turned out to be a lie because when the wife later came, she narrated what actually happened,” the official aid.
The distraught mother of the children, who arrived the hospital much later after their bodies were brought to the burns unit of the Gbagada General Hospital, told hospital officials in tears that Udofia was beating her when he angrily kicked a lit stove.
“The woman narrated that as he kicked the stove, it landed on their refrigerator, which immediately exploded. We were told the children were nearby when the refrigerator exploded,” the hospital official said.
The children were reportedly engulfed in flames but all efforts to save them proved abortive. Gbagada General Hospital officials said they were brought in dead.
When our correspondents visited the hospital, naval personnel and an ambulance of the Nigerian Navy Reference Hospital, Ojo were seen in the front of the hospital.
Udofia was said to be receiving treatment in a ward in the hospital as well but he was kept away from inquisitive eyes.
The bodies of the children had also been taken to the hospital’s mortuary by the time, our correspondent got there.
Hospital officials feared for the sanity of the children’s mother, who was said to have been taken away by her church officials.
“The woman was not acting normal anymore. That may be to the psychological trauma of the event,” a hospital official said.
Saturday PUNCH contacted the spokesperson of the Western Naval Command, Lagos, Lt. Way Olabisi, for comment, but he said he was in a meeting at the time.
*I feel like shouting "Woe and more woe unto any woman who remains in an abusive marriage", but I won't say it because of God*
Good morning peeps.
Like I said yesterday, through out this month, we will be celebrating the 'Naijafamily' by promoting healthy lifestyles that every family should inculcate. Healthy living is not only for the woman. What is good for the goose is good for the gander. In other words, if a woman is trying to eat healthier meals and exercise, she should make sure she carries other members of the family along.
What are these healthy lifestyles you may ask?
First and foremost, let me start by mentioning that most chronic diseases (Hypertension, Cancers, Diabetes and Obesity) we are running from, share some, if not all, causative factors. These factors which cause these health problems can be 'Non - modifiable' or 'Modifiable'.
The Non-modifiable factors (factors you cannot change) are things like your age, sex, race, genes. You can't change these ones, and they play major roles in the occurrence and distribution of diseases.
The Modifiable factors that cause these diseases include:
- Excess intake of fatty foods
- Excess intake of salt
- Lack of exercise
- Smoking
- Excess Alcohol Consumption.
Therefore, we will be discussing everything about healthy diets for the whole family, what foods the family should avoid and the ones they should eat more of, as well as the type of cooking oils mothers can use, quantity of salt and better ways of preparing meals for the family. And also how family members who smoke can reduce or stop completely. The same goes for alcohol consumption, how much is too much?
Why am I doing this?
Because I am sick and tired of watching families lose their loved ones to diseases they could have prevented!
Children also have hypertension and die from cancers. I know we don't have a total say on how long we will live but at least we can contribute positively to our longevity and leave the rest to God.
So I will try and post pictures (and maybe videos) as we go along, so as to buttress my points. *The key word being "TRY"! So join me in our Family Lifestyle Modification Month Campaign.
You guys can follow me on Twitter @ naijahousewife.
My loves, sorry for being AWOL for some days now. It's not easy to be a hustler! *This money of a thing is not being distributed well!...Ogas at the top take note*
This month is Naijafamily Month courtesy, your one and only naijahousewife! So let's celebrate together. Everything that has to do with family health, we shall be discussing here and if we can't finish it on this forum, we shall carry it to Twitter @ naijahousewife...so let's go dia!
I just read this article online and I was forced to share it with you guys especially with those who have ears. I will just be posting related matters but won't say much! From all indications, some women have been cursed and some are perpetually under a spell!
Read on....
A man, Wahab Lawal has been arrested by the Lagos State Police Command after he allegedly stabbed his wife, Bola to death in the Oto, Ebute Meta area of the state.
Wahab who friends described as having a hot temper is said to have killed his wife on March 26, after 5 previous failed attempts.
Recounting what happened, a friend of the deceased Mrs. Hadijat Abdulrasheed said Bola married Wahab after the death of her husband and she had two children for him in addition to the three she had from her previous marriage.
She explained that Bola had moved out of her husband's house to stay with her prior to the incident after she was convinced her husband wanted to kill her. At one time, he had used a stool to hit her on the head just to wake her up, at another time, he had used a screw driver to stab her in the ear.
Mrs Abdulrasheed said that after Bola moved out of the house, she still went there once in a while to get a few things and also take care of her children.
On that fateful day, Wahab who was jobless had approached the deceased and begged for forgiveness but she refused. He also begged her to come back to the house which she declined and an argument ensued. It was during the argument that Wahab used a knife which he usually carries around to stab Bola and she bled to death.
Wahab was arrested after the incident was reported at the Iponri Police Division. He was later transferred to the State Criminal Investigation Department, Yaba.
Meanwhile, it was learnt that the deceased had been buried according to Islamic rites.
Now, do you see what I mean?! It's obvious that this woman had signed a death warrant. What would it have taken her to visit her ex-home with armed policemen, when you know you have sick husband? Well, all I can say to her is "Rest in Perfect Peace".
