JUST FOR LAUGHS! (ADULTS ONLY ZONE)

According to Women's Health Magazine,

Sex is amazing, don't get us wrong. But with all the great things that come with it, there's a whole boatload of stuff that can make us cringe, too.

If you're scratching your head and wondering, "Whatever could she be talking about?" then you can put your hand back in your pocket, because I'm going to fill in the blanks for you. Get ready for your "Aha!" moment.

1. Morning Breath
Morning sex is so awesome! But morning breath, even the most bearable of morning breath is still not nice. Brushing your teeth beforehand is nice, though!

2. Leg Cramp
Well, it was just a matter of time before it was going to happen, because no one can keep their legs like that forever.

3. Farting
Yep, it happens to the best of us. It just does.

4. Having To Pee
Maybe you should have gone before, but you got distracted by the chance to have sex right then and there, so now you’ve got to go NOW.

5. Bloody Sheets
You thought your period was over? But it's not, it wasn't, and now you have that ugly brown streak that looks like anything but blood on your sheets.

6. The "O" Face
Does anyone make a pretty face when they have an orgasm? This is a serious question.

7. 69
It's great in theory, but when it comes down to it, it’s just an awkward position that makes not just breathing (if he’s on top) difficult, but the enjoyable factor zero, especially if there’s a huge height difference.

8. Dryness
For women, this is our version of a penis that refuses to get erect. Our wetness usually determines how turned on we are, and when things are all dried up, not only can it give our partner insecurities, but it makes for VERY painful penetration. This is one of the nasty side effects of being drunk or hungover.

9. "No, I Didn't Orgasm"
Well, then. This is pretty awkward. Totally normal, but awkward.

10. Dirty Talk
While there may be no time like the present, it's not true for dirty talk. Sometimes it just fails miserably.

11. Complaints From Your Roommate Or Neighbor

You're having a hot and heavy time, then you either get a knock on the wall or a passive aggressive text from someone in the vicinity: "Can you keep it down please?" Mood. Killed. 

12. Failed Positions
You really should have known your balance wasn’t that good, and that it would result with you both on the floor, and one of you with a nosebleed.

13. Pubic Hair

Whether you love them or hate them, or have chosen to wax them all away, everyone seems to have a preference, and I think we can all agree that it’s just not necessarily pretty. Get one stuck in your throat and, well, expect it to be there for days.

14. The Bra Struggle
Although it's assumed that most men can undo a bra in less than 10 seconds by the time they're out of college, that’s not always the case. Especially if that bra clips in the front—dudes just don't get how that can be a possibility.

15. Sweat
Totally natural, but sometimes you just don’t want to be slippin’ and slidin’ on your partner. In addition to being unsexy, it can be downright dangerous!

16. The Waiting Game
You know when you’ve already climaxed and now you have to wait for your partner to get there, too? It’s not that you don’t care. It’s just that you’re ready for a nap.

17. The Weird Smell
Bodily fluids and sweat do make for one hell of an, um, interesting scent.

18. The Wet Spot
 You know exactly what I'm talking about. Exactly.

19. "I'm Coming! I'm Coming!"

Yeah, I get it, but you've been saying that for almost 25 minutes now. Just come already, and quit announcing it as if you want some sort of medal!

Well, like I said...it's just for laughs.

DO YOU THINK COUPLES SHOULD HAVE A JOINT ACCOUNT?

This was last week's Poll Question.

Majority of you voted and Yes!! Results are out...

75% of you voted that couples can have a joint account so long as they have their own individual accounts.

While 25% of you thought the idea of couples owning a joint account was 'repulsive' ..putting it mildly!! *hehehe*

Well, I think I go with the 75% of people! 

What do you think? All ye who didn't get to vote!

WARNING!! BEAUTY HABITS THAT MAKE YOU WRINKLE!

Oh my goodness, wives! While I was about to send in my post for the day, I stumbled on this very important stuff that had to do with ageing, wrinkling or whatever you want to call it! 

Not that this 'gist' concerns me as such (yeah, say it..."I'm vain!") but I do have some really 'cuckoo' friends who it totally affects! They never listen when I advice them, they say I'm a 'babalawo' doctor (in other words native doctor).

Anyway, according to Women's health magazine, even though wrinkles are a part of ageing and life, our beauty routines and other habits can contribute tremendously to it! So if you are involved in any of the following, you better stop immediately:

1. Smoking - this has been proven to cause wrinkling. It makes the skin droop and have uneven complexion. It also contributes to the lines around the eyes called "crow's feet". 

2. Diet - you better believe it or not, "you are what you eat!" *Gbam!*. Too much sugar (refined one) in your diet, not only affects your weight, it makes you age by a process called Glycation. It is a process whereby the sugar molecules attach to the proteins in your skin (even the collagen that every magazine shouts about), causing them to be stiff and malformed. This results in a loss of facial elasticity, contours, puffiness and fine lines. 

3. Alcohol - this one totally dehydrates the skin. It depletes your vitamin A level which is an important antioxidant for the skin and regeneration of new cells. Vitamin A is also necessary for collagen formation - so no collagen for your skin if you keep drinking! *Ntoing!* #theyknowthemselves

4. Chewing Gum - * thank God, I've stopped this one by force not by choice* . It produces wrinkles around the lower mouth, as well as, messes the mouth structure. 

5. Not Removing Makeup - *i can't shout too much for this one...too many 'sinners' out there*. The make up and other environmental pollutants accumulate on your skin, seeping into your pores, breaking down collagen and elastin. So, make sure you cleanse and moisturizer every night before bed!

6. Picking Pimples - nasty habit! Allow it to come and go naturally or you apply some treatment. When you pull and or pick, you are seriously damaging your skin, creating irritation and scars. 

7. Stretching Your Skin To Apply Makeup - *Hands up! It used to be my favorite past time!* especially when applying liquid eyeliner or mascara! *Hehehe! Chics out there, are you feeling me?!*  Stop tugging at those eye, it encourages them 'crows'....if you know what I mean!

8. Not Using Sunscreen - this is the worst thing anyone, especially women can do to themselves! It still beats me how women use 'bleaching' creams more judiciously than sunscreen! Even with our 'Naija' sun. Nna mehn! You people are trying! If you don't know the one to get, can you not ask?! Wear the sunscreen everyday, whether rain or shine. Choose a minimum of SPF 30 and one that contains zinc oxide and titanium dioxide ( I almost started writing equation here to confuse some people but the Spirit ministered to me!) 

9. Sleeping - in fact!... Sleeping on your face causes wrinkling. *Hian* if you must sleep on you face! then sleep on a satin or silk pillowcase. The other alternative is to sleep on your back.

Dais it, my people! Anyone who has other things to add, feel free in the comment box! 

Do have a fun filled and blessed day. 

AN IMPORTANT NOTE FOR NIGERIAN WOMEN, WIVES AND MOTHERS

Good morning beautiful wives! 

I don't need to say much today even though this is not what I wanted to post. Who knows? I might still post the main gist for today but this one that they have called off strike, I dunno O!...let's see how it goes. 

Many of you have been calling me all sorts, from 'Beijing woman' to 'Husband disciplinarian' to 'Feminist', just to mention a few. I hope you have read Chimamanda's position or opinion on the role of the African woman (she didn't say it is on African women but she must be referring to us nah!). Even though I don't totally agree with all her points of view, this one completely sums up my thoughts so far on the Nigerian woman. And it is a behaviour that has been passed down from generation to generation and is still being passed down. 

Let's come very close home, in fact, the women I (emphasis on I please take note) meet on a daily basis. They are so fake in every aspect of the word, pretending to be the most righteous or holiest than thou, pretending to love God more than you! Damn! I hate that they been you and your lifestyle, meanwhile they want some of it so bad. You can tell that they are struggling to be their true self, but society and their mothers have moulded them to "...turn pretense into an art form", according to my dear Chimamanda. It takes a strong woman who appreciates her 'Essence' to break free from the society's perception of her.

These women who have been trained to be silent, are the ones that fall victim to Domestic Violence and all manners of oppression. When 'stubborn' women like me act our true selves, rather than these 'oppressed' women be encouraged, motivated or inspired, they begin to either tarnish your image, show pseudo disapproval or start an unnecessary hostility towards you. I have learnt along my path to self-discovery ( coming out soon, 'My Path to Self-Discovery) to be content with what God has blessed me with. People often wonder what the secret of my 'extreme' happiness and excitement is, and I laugh telling them that It's God...cliche right?! Wrong! The fact that I am alive, is that not a reason to be happy. The fact that God gives you another chance each day you get up from your bed, is that not enough reason to be always excited?! The fact that God provides for me and my family "our daily bread" not monthly or yearly O! but every day's bread, is that not enough reason to be excited. The fact that my family has no reason to sorrow...not that death is inevitable O! But I am forever greatful to God almighty for everything...how did I get to this place?! *hehehe*

Mothers, please teach your daughters everything they need to know to reach their highest potential. Teach them to have a voice. Teach them to serve and to be served. Teach them to love and be loved. Teach them to be independent in their thoughts, words and actions.

Infact, let me end this conversation, by stating clearly that until you start to be yourselves, until you start to find your own voice, until you start embracing who you are, your very essence as a woman, you can never, I repeat never be happy or and fulfilled in your marriage, talkless of yourselves. You will continue to be miserable till you die(God forbid) or your husband replaces you for a finer and happier woman. 

Let's learn to draw strength from each other, be our sisters' keeper. Don't be a hater, don't hold grudges( absolutely not necessary). 

Live and let live!!

MY HUSBAND HITS ME BUT EVERYONE THINKS HE IS A SAINT!

Na wah O! Wonders will never cease sha! This matter of Domestic Violence is still very much a marriage dilemma. Maybe it has come to the point where I have to painfully accept that some things will just never change! I got a mail from an anonymous lady who was willing to share her story with the world and I must say that a lot of women apparently are in the same situation.

Read on...

Dear NHW,

I have been following your blog for some time now and I got hooked after I read your various articles on violence against women. I chose not to say anything, not because I didn't want to but because there wasn't anything more to add, your article said it all. 

My own situation is somewhat precarious. I will not exactly say that my husband beats me to the point of giving me a black eye or breaking any of my bones. Instead he does more of shouting down at me especially in front of my children or the maids. He slaps me if I continue to talk back even at him. The slap is usually once but very painful and sometimes I see stars. Let me just say he oppresses me. But what I find very confusing is that he totally behaves himself in front of my people, his family members and friends. It's as if he knows when and where he should misbehave or not misbehave. 

To the world, my husband is so charming, always smiling, a great conversationalist and generous. He amazes me with his act. In my marriage, I don't have a voice at all. I am not even allowed to make any decision without involving him, if not I bear the consequences. He claims he loves me especially when I try talking to him about his behaviour but that he hates when I contradict his authority in the house. 

I am not happy with the person I have become. I am a very intelligent and extrovertish kind of woman. But since I got married (getting to 5years), I see my self withdrawing from my friends, for fear that I will leak this secret I have been keeping. People close to me keep asking what the matter is but I can't even open my mouth to say it. I am so ashamed of myself and my marriage. My children are my comfort. 

Please help me out of this situation. Please. 

*O my dear fellow wife, I feel your pain from the depth of my heart. You left some information out sha like how long you knew him before marriage and how his behaviour was before marriage too. I would also like to know his educational level and his kind of job as compared to yours. Because I have observed over time that a lot of men are intimidated by strong intelligent and beautiful women. Sometimes you are not the reason for their violence but their insecurities. They need to feel like men by oppressing their wives. Like I told you in my reply, you need to see a psychologist to help you with your self-esteem which has been traumatized severely. After you have worked on yourself, only then will you be ready for the next step. 

A note for other women in same situation, please Domestic violence or Intimate Partner Abuse does not only involve physical abuse, it involves emotional and verbal abuse. *

May God guide women in their decisions. 

MY WEDDING IS ROUND THE CORNER AND MY 'FLING' IS PREGNANT FOR ME!

Good morning my lovelies!

I am really feeling this Naija weather lately! Maybe all those days I didn't publish any post were days I was a bit under the weather! *hehehe*

On a serious note, I got a mail from a desperate young man who is in desperate need of an advice. *It's chilling to know that guys read this blog that is perceived to be 'feminist'*

I dunno what to say, in fact, this is a classic example of 'one chance'! 

Read on...

Dear NHW,

Thank you for giving me an opportunity to speak my mind. I am so depressed right now. I keep wondering and wishing I can turn back the hand of the clock, but it's not possible. 

My wedding is set to occur on the 27th of September, 2014. Personally, I am not ready to get married but my fiancé is a few weeks pregnant so we had to move the wedding dates backwards. You see the problem is not the fact that my fiancé is pregnant, but the fact that she is not the only one pregnant for me! A lady I met at a friend's party about 3 months ago is also pregnant for me. 

And to think I never wanted to attend the party because I sort of knew I would do something stupid and since I was getting married soon, I wanted to stay focused on the preparations and my fiancé. This lady in question knows I am about to get married and has refused to abort the pregnancy. Her family have been harassing me and my family, trying to force me to marry her or be ready to face the consequences. I am not denying the pregnancy but I simply cannot marry her. 

Presently, my fiancé is not aware of what has been going on. I am afraid that if she is aware she may end the relationship. And I love her so much. She is a typical wife material; calm and intelligent, knows how to take care of her man.

I have been avoiding my house and hanging out with friends and fiancé but for how long?! My fling's family have threatened to disrupt the wedding and my family are tired asking me to sort my problems out on my own! Friends have tried for me by following me to beg the fling's family. The way things are going, I'm afraid my fiancé will get to hear about it and cancel the wedding. Please what do I do?

*My dear, you need to accept God into your life! You have no choice but to break the news to her. A relationship based on deceit right from the onset will not last. If she is for you, she will stand by you through thick and thin and if she breaks off the relationship, then she is not for you!!*

Over to you guys in the house, help your fellow man out!!

I AM A SURROGATE BUT MY HUSBAND DOES NOT KNOW!

 Blog readers, good morning O! I got this mail and the lady in question wants to know her chances of been caught! I really do not know what to make of this, because I am really 'flabberwhelmed'! You women never cease to amaze me!

Read on...

Dear NHW,

I am writing you live from London. I have been following your blog and I must confess, I am hooked! I am actually writing to confess my 'sin' and I had an argument with a friend who claims that I am taking a huge risk in what I am doing and that chances are high that I might be caught. I want to prove to her that some people do things for a just cause and because of that God shields them. So I need people to comment and tell me if I am wrong.

I am married with 3 children, the last being 6yrs old. I am in my late 30s. My marriage is somewhat a happy one except that my husband is quite stingy towards me. He doesn't really take care of me despite his financial buoyancy. He can do anything for his children and his relatives but when it comes to my own, his hands become really tight. 

I am a graduate of a reputable University in Nigeria but I have never worked since I got married. I and my husband thought it best for me to stay home and take care of the children. And since I wasn't being taken care of by my husband I decided to look for means to make money for myself. I stumbled on a friend one day whom I had not seen in close to 8yrs and she was heavy with child. We got talking and I opened up to her what I was passing through and that was when she told me that the pregnancy she was carrying was not for her and her husband, that this was her 2nd surrogate pregnancy. She said her and her husband decided to go into it for financial reasons. 

When I got home later that day, I gave what she revealed to me a deep thought and decided I was going to do the same. I managed to psyche my husband to enrol me for a Masters in the UK because that would and should give me enough time to carry the pregnancy I was planning. My friend linked me up with potential clients who desperately agreed to my terms. NHW, you can't imagine my excitement then. If anyone told me I would have this much cash in my hand, I would have sworn for them.

I got admission into the school of my choice in London and I left for it 2 months after the insemination. No one knew in Nigeria apart from that my friend. I am now 8months gone and still no one knows! I have not gone home since I left for school but I have been skyping with family members. I don't allow them see the lower part of my body. Luckily for me, I do not swell up during pregnancy.

So that is it O! My situation, as far as I am concerned is a Win-Win one. At the end of the day, everybody will be happy! 

*Coughing and clearing my throat* ...Bia, this woman, you are being very deceitful and I don't remember reading anywhere where deceit pays! You are acting out of your own selfish interest because you are not even thinking about your kids, God forbid, if anything should happen. Now your friend is trying to put 'bad-mouth' inside what you are doing by saying you will be caught, you better pray your way out of it! And please be careful who you share your personal business with. It would have paid you to confide in a very close relative such as a sibling. For the record, my dear woman, money isn't everything so basing all your happiness on money is preposterous.

Over to my panel of judges...

THE WRATH OF INDOMIE NOODLES!

Just when I was dealing with the 'selfie bug', taking different positions (you see that's what the 'selfie bug' does to you, it makes you move your head and body in different positions, until the 'fits' wear off!), my last daughter peeps through the door of the room, and guess what she asks me?...

 Yeah! God knows I have been trying unsuccessfully for sometime now to ban 'Indomie' and all it's counterparts in my house! 

It's scary to know that some kids are extremely comfortable eating that Indomie 3-6 times a day as a main meal. With all the stuff I have been hearing about Indomie, how it's made from the material used in producing nylon or whatever, and that it is known to cause heart issues or cancer! Sometimes all these talk makes me question my abilities as a doctor! I forget that I should have evidence-based medicine as a guide in my decisions and just act as a plain ( well not exactly plain...hehehe!) old ( there I go again!...) mother!

Anyways, I summoned my kids and we had a long talk on restrictions on Indomie consumption until I totally ban it. You should have seen their faces! I won't lie, it touched my heart sha and it almost made me withdraw my statement, but thank God I stood my grounds!

Few days passed, and it seemed like I was winning until my last baby ( yes O! Last...all you evil people sending me arrow of children...back to sender O! *clapping and shouting in market woman style*) comes and does that...pix above! 

What do you think my reply was?...the first person that guesses right will get a recharge card of his or her preferred network! I am serious. 

While you are thinking of the answer, this is one of my treasured selfies of all times...you can have as a keepsake! *tongue out* 

HAS YOUR CHILD BEEN SCREENED?

 "Prevention is better than cure" or at least that is what World Health Organization (WHO) preaches. But the fact still remains, how many people believe this talkless of adhering to it!

The screening I am referring to in this article is not the physical screening but the psychosocial screening of adolescents (children between the ages of 10 and 19 years). This is a secondary level of prevention wherby an adolescent health consultant is able to detect problems in young people early enough and then manage it before they turn to something else in adulthood. Children who escape this screening, maybe because their parents do not believe in it or these same parents rather hand these kids over to their pastor, usually end up getting involved in risky behaviours, such as alcohol abuse, drug addiction (now this is really common!), early onset of sexual activity. Some may end up being suicidal, under-achievers, infact, generally misbehaving or delinquents. 

Adolescence is a transitional period from childhood to adulthood and can be a time of 'storm' and 'stress' because of the changes these children undergo physically, mentally, emotionally and socially. So it's important that parents try every possible way to create that enabling environment for them to be nurtured properly. But there are factors in our environment that inhibit this such as our:

- culture (which can be annoyingly and unnecessarily conservative)

- religion (that totally restricts an individual from exploring and expressing their true self, not in a way to displease God as such O!)

- socioeconomic conditions ( poverty, lack of education)

- political factors ( the Nigerian government that has failed to train people who will give consistent and accurate un-biased health education in schools generally especially in sexual and reproductive health)

Now, let me state some facts for you concerning Adolescents and Adolescence:

- Skills-based health education is a necessity for all adolescents

- Adolecents are a product of their environment so it is up to you as a parent to do the needful for your child. 

- Positive behaviour and change in an adolescent does not just come like that without exposing that child to health information and skills to make the right decision at the right time. 

Up till now, I am still bewildered at the level of Health Illiteracy amongst Nigerian parents and people in general. When you ask a Nigerian parent to screen their children so as to address their specific health needs or ask them to enrol their kids for regular health education classes, these are some of the things you will hear:

- "Dem no need am, when the time reach!"

- "My mother did not give me any and see how well I turned out, therefore my kids will get by"

- "It is not my child's portion in Jesus name"

- "I know my child...Lai Lai! He can never do that"

The list is endless. Need I remind you that we are not dealing with 'portions' here but facts!

This is the computer age! Our kids are getting smarter and carried away too. Your parenting styles can make or mar the relationship you have with your kids. 

See what is happening these days, children committing suicide, killing their parents, raping innocent people and animals (yes! Animals o!) After these same adults or parents will be wondering why and how those kids could have committed such heinous acts, when actually, these problems could have been prevented if they had been screened!

Another annoying thing some parents do is that, those that eventually screen their kids and agree to health education classes, think it is a one-off thing! Let me remind you that, "Learning is a continuous and life long process!" And the health education they receive is meant to be repetitive. You are not doing the adolescent health consultants a favour but your kids! It's cheaper to spend trying to prevent than curing a problem. What is the point producing a child who is academically sound but a serious social retard or delinquent. I would rather have a dull child than have a child who will bring disgrace to the family!

Any way, enough said! A word is enough for those who choose to heed to good advice. Look for an adolescent-friendly clinic and register your child. For now ASTRAH INITIATIVE is the only adolescent-friendly clinic that offers the specialized screening for adolescents.

To get in touch with an Adolescent Health Consultant, call the following numbers and make your bookings or enquiries: 

08164968203

08021221034

08091816010

Or send mail to astrahinitiative@yahoo.com

Don't dilly dally. You still have enough time to secure your child's future. 

I AM MARRIED BUT MY BOSS'S MISTRESS

O my Goodness Gracious! You are about to read something mind-blowing!...a mail I just got from one of my readers. 

This reader needs your advice. *But I'm not sure if she really needs advice as she claims or just looking for an avenue to report herself* Lols!!

Babe, I am not laughing at you O! But the awkwardness of the whole situation. 

 

Please, people read on...

Dear NHW,

I can't even begin to describe the kind of soup I am in right now or how I even got into this mess I am about to share with you.

I have been married for 5 years with 2 handsome boys. And in those 5years of marriage, I have never worked. My husband is a civil servant and if I must say, coping has not been that easy. This condition affected me so much that I slowly dropped from my normal size 18 to a size 12.

I think my sudden weightloss somehow paid off, because I got a job as a personal assistant to the managing director of a consulting firm. My husband doesn't know this, he thinks I got the post of a marketing executive. It's something he has always showed distaste for..Personal Assistant. He always felt there were other 'jobs' attached to it. Well, he didn't think wrong. 

My boss took an immediate attraction for me, and I him. An affair soon started, a stormy one sef. He went as far as renting an apartment for me in Lekki, far from where I stay in Surulere. We would spend most weekends there. My husband believed that as a marketing personnel, we had regular trainings. I usually got my mum to stand in for me on those days. 

Since I got the job, things have gotten a lot better; I have a car of my own, I pay my children's school fees, I even contribute to the house rent. In short I lack nothing! But I am emotionally drained and it is beginning to take a toll on me. I am tired of the arrangement, maybe it is because I have almost all I need or I don't love my boss. All I know is that I am tired and I want out. How do I break off from something as deep as this? I am scared of the outcome. I don't want anyone blackmailing me or destroying my face or family out of rage! Please help me voice out. 

*Wow! My dear I don't envy you at all! I can imagine what you are going through. It is not in my place to judge you for your problems because I am not perfect either. All I can say is that you need to do what makes you happy without necessarily hurting your loved ones. And since this is bothering you so much, the only adult thing to do is to look for a conducive moment and talk to your boss about it. I am glad you never mentioned anything about domestic violence, because I was looking out for that! So he doesn't appear to be a difficult person. I would advice you stop living in deceit since it is already affecting you negatively. And prayer does absolute wonders!*

Over to you O! My people. 

CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS?!

When I saw this crazy image on a friend's dp (display picture), I thought to myself "wtf" (and I mean Wednesday, Thursday, Friday) *wink*

It only takes a really "sane" person to do this! I mean, common, you post a pix like this...so what am I supposed to think? Really?!

This pix is sooooo disgusting!...I hate roaches! They make the house look so dirty! *sticking my tongue out*

WHAT MAKES A WOMAN STAY IN LOVE?

 Guys, before you crucify me, please forgive me for all the times I've been unavoidably absent! I've missed you guys too. I know I've said this a thousand times before, but this time I mean it...honest!

Don't wonder too much about my topic, and No, I didn't make any mistake. I guess, when one is married, the question shifts from "What makes a woman fall in love?" to "What makes a woman stay in love?"

The reasons are not far-fetched. We basically stay in love for the same reasons we fall in love in the first instance, apart from mere attraction 

 Or sweet nothings told by men 

 I know a lot of things happen during the course of marriage that alter those reasons slowly. But 2 reasons, after much thought, makes a woman stick around: she will stay in love with that one person who can make her laugh and give her all the attention (care) when she  wants and needs it. 

...Reminds me of Mariah Carey's "Dream Lover" "...dream lover come rescue me, take me up, take me down, take me anywhere you want to babe,now. I need you so desperately..."

*Goodness gracious! I almost got carried away there*

WHAT EVERY WOMAN SHOULD TELL HER GYNAECOLOGISTS

According to Women's Health Magazine,

There are some things that you'd barely consider telling your best friend—let alone your gynecologist. But the truth is, they've heard and seen it all. Plus, there are some things that, while embarrassing, could be really vital when it comes to taking care of your sexual and reproductive health. Here, eleven things you should definitely tell your gynecologist:

How Many Sexual Partners You’ve Had
Has it been a particularly eventful year? Tell your gyno that—even if she doesn't ask. She's not going to judge you, and this is really useful information from a medical standpoint, says ob-gyn Alyssa Dweck, M.D., coauthor of V is For Vagina. "The more information that's disclosed that seems to be relevant, the more individualized care that can be given."

If You've Had Unprotected Sex—Even Once
So you slipped up and didn't use a condom a while back, but since then you've gotten your period and haven't noticed any signs of an STD. You're in the clear, right? Not exactly. Some STDs, like Chlamydia, are often completely symptomless, while others like HPV can lay dormant for years, says Dweck. It's your responsibility to tell your doctor if you may be at risk for these after having unprotected sex.

If You're Not Able to Orgasm
Just think about it—unless you're seeing a sex therapist, who else would you go to for sexual dysfunction issues? Your gynecologist knows what you're working with and wants to help. "If you're having orgasm issues, that's something we can usually help with," says Dweck. "It may require a referral, or it may be a signal of another type of health problem going on." 

If You Occasionally Bleed After Sex
If it's just one time after particularly rough sex, you probably don't have to run to the doctor, says Dweck. But if it's more than once, you should let your gyno know. Bleeding after sex can signify anything from an infection or dryness problem to a precancerous cervical issue. It's better to be safe than embarrassed.

If Your Period Has Been Wonky Lately
Even if you're sure you're not pregnant, changes in your period are something you should definitely bring up to your doctor. If your flow is much heavier or lighter than normal, it can be the result of so many different things, says Dweck, including hormonal imbalances, a cyst, or an infection.

If Sex is Painful
Don't be shy—chances are your gyno can help with this. It may be due to a slight tilt in your uterus, or you may be suffering from vaginal dryness, says ob-gyn Mary Jane Minkin, M.D., clinical professor at the Yale School of Medicine. That's not just a problem for older women—it's an issue that many younger women deal with, too, and it may even be a side effect of your birth control. Bring it up for the sake of your sex life.

What Medications or Supplements You're Taking
This is important for so many reasons—whether you're starting a new birth control regimen, trying to get pregnant, or require surgery, says Dweck. Even herbal supplements can have contraindications, so let your gyno know exactly what you’re taking. 

If You've Been Sexually Abused
Whether you’re looking for someone to talk to, worried about STDs, or seeking resources that can help, your gynecologist can point you in the right direction. This is especially important for the many women who don't have a primary care doctor, says Dweck, since their gynecologist could be the only one they see on a yearly basis. "Many patients may not know that their gynecologist could be the person to offer some assistance," says Dweck.

If You Notice a Funky Smell
This is usually a sign of an infection or pH imbalance, which your gynecologist can treat. Interestingly, Dweck mentioned another common culprit: a tampon (or piece of a tampon) that was left inside you. Minor changes in odor around your period are normal, but if you notice something super off, call up your gyno. 

What You're Thinking About Pregnancy and Fertility
This isn't just something to bring up to your gyno when you run into a roadblock. If you're considering getting pregnant in the next year, definitely tell your doctor, says Minkin. They can give you helpful tips and medical advice that they wouldn't normally offer up on a regular visit. And even if you aren't planning a pregnancy right now, it's a good idea to broach the topic of fertility with your doctor if you're ever concerned. They can tell you about healthy habits that will help preserve fertility and address any concerns you may have. "My job is to make sure women don't get pregnant when they don't want to and do get pregnant when they do want to," says Minkin.   

If Your Sleep and Your Periods Have Been Off Lately
If you're in your early forties, these could be signs of perimenopause, says Minkin. While it's rare to start seeing symptoms this early, it's definitely not unheard of, she says. Bringing these symptoms up to your gynecologist may help you pinpoint the cause early on.   

Well, it's not that easy, considering the fact that we live in a 'secretive' society. It's only when push comes to shove that people start confessing! 

WOULDN'T LIFE BE MUCH BETTER IF PEOPLE COULD FOCUS ON GETTING SOME EDUCATION?!

The Lagos State Police Command has arrested two suspected Armed Robbers,  Sikiru Oyebamiji and Afeez Salami said to be members of a Notorious gang terrorizing Lagos and its Environs.

Suspected Armed Robbers nabbed by the Lagos state Police command

around 11 pm in Mushin area on their way to carry out an operation. – See more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2014/08/use-robbery-proceeds-train-daughter-school-robbery-suspect/#sthash.7cuGqYqg.dpuf

around 11 pm in Mushin area on their way to carry out an operation. – See more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2014/08/use-robbery-proceeds-train-daughter-school-robbery-suspect/#sthash.7cuGqYqg.dpuf

The suspects  who said robbing people was more profitable than their legal job were arrested by the Special Anti-Robbery Squad on Friday, July 31, around 12.30am in the Mushin area of Lagos when they were allegedly heading for an operation.

They were nabbed  a locally-made pistol.

It was further gathered that the duo had taken a cab from Oshodi, and the vehicle had got to a checkpoint around Mushin where SARS operatives asked the occupants to alight.

The suspects were said to have ordered the driver to evade the policemen, threatening to shoot him if he refused.

But the operatives arrested the suspects and recovered the pistol from them.

After their arrest, the suspects confessed that they were nine in the gang. They also told the police that there were two other locally-made guns belonging to the gang.

According to Punch, the suspects had taken to robbery because their respective jobs were not lucrative enough.

Twenty-four-year-old Oyebamiji who hails from Apomu Ikire, Osun State, said he was a cobbler and bus conductor before he joined the gang.

He said, “I was formerly a bus conductor, and a cobbler, before joining the gang. I sold Indian hemp too. I met the gang leader at a night club, and he advised me to be a part of them. We are actually nine in the gang. In most of the operations, we stole phones, gold, laptops, jewellery, and money. I did not like robbery, but I had no option because my work did not give me enough money.”

Oyebamiji, who lives on Lawanson Road, Itire, added that he had gone for about five operations with the gang, and made at least N20,000 from each.

He said: “I have gone out with the gang on about five occasions. We robbed in Sango, Ogun State; Egbeda, Ojuelegba and Pleasure Ile Epo areas in Lagos. We collected money and property in the process. I used the money from armed robbery to send my son to school. I realised about N20,000 from each operation.”

The second suspect, 21-year-old Salami also said he took to robbery because his work was not lucrative.

He said: “I was living in the Ojuelegba area, and I was a meat seller (butcher). But, meat selling was not bringing me much money. So, I joined the gang. We make use of three guns, but the two other guns are with the boss. I realised about N15,000 from each robbery operation. I am actually an orphan. Nobody was taking care of me.”

AMIDST THE TEARS AND THE FEARS...

This Ebola Virus has given the whole world quite a scare. *phew!* I mean, I had to practically give my kids a full lecture on Ebola and how to prevent it. 

I even thought my ipad had caught the virus! For almost 2weeks my 'baby' suffered a 'sore-throat' and lost its voice! And Voila! Only for this afternoon, it survived the virus!

Anyways, amidst all the tears and fears of Ebola, it's good to know that people have actually survived this dreaded disease! 

According to Jo Dunlop, a UNICEF consultant based in Sierra Leone, people have survived the Ebola virus. Before they are released from the Ebola Treatment Centre, they are presented with transport money to get home, a clean set of clothes, and a certificate declaring that they are healthy and now Ebola-free. 

Pictures after the cut...

So you see, with God on our side, we can overcome these disease. 

JUST FOR LAUGHS!

Since this Ebola outbreak, there is nothing that someone will not see, hear or read. Naija peeps sure know how to make jokes out of serious issues. 

How can I help but not love my people. #ProudlyNaija

Happy Sunday!!

COUPLE WHO TOOK REAL LIFE PHOTOS WITH THEIR STILLBIRTH CHILD :(

This couple decided to have a photoshoot of their dead daughter, so as to keep memories of her alive and make her feel like she really was part of the family.

See how real these pictures are!!...*weep weep*

For Nigerian Girls, Education Is The Key That Opens Doors To Progress

This op-ed was written on behalf of five Nigerian sisters in their quest to get an education.

I grew up in Nigeria, in a culture where bearing a son validates a woman and her family, and a male innately holds the superior position in society over a female. At 11 years of age, I escorted my mother to deliver her fifth baby girl, my youngest sister, and watched our mom die in the hands of an unfit doctor.

My mother had succumbed to the confines of her society; even though she already had four healthy daughters, having a son was a traditional standard she was determined to achieve, even at the expense of her life. Realizing the underlying factors that subjected her to such a predicament presented a vivid picture of my position as a girl in Nigerian society.

Almost immediately, the importance of education took on a different meaning in my life and in the lives of my four sisters. I went on to receive a Bachelor's degree in Chemistry and a Master's of Science in Urban Affairs. With my education, I have been able to sponsor my younger sisters' education in Nigeria, thereby increasing our likelihood of having a progressive future that far surpasses the traditional limitations defined by our society.

For Nigerian girls like my sisters and I, education is the key that opens the door when an opportunity to succeed beyond customary expectations knocks. Education is a fundamental right, to which I firmly believe we should be naturally entitled. It is the only chance most Nigerian girls have to rise above the cultural and traditional system of stratification that continue to cast women as inferior to their male counterparts, economically, politically and socially. Women who have been able to escape such subjugation have done so mostly by being empowered through education. A good education offers Nigerian girls the opportunity of being valued members of their society and for this vital reason I am devoted and driven to ensure that my sisters continue with their studies.

For girls in Nigeria and around the world, education can enable economic independence, pave the way for political participation, and empower both men and women with the necessary knowledge to actively and effectively oppose oppressive norms that perpetuate different forms of violence against women. And in contrast to the culture of gender inequality that persists in Nigeria, education serves as an avenue of exposure to a cultural alternative. Nigerian girls stand to benefit from this exposure, and the possibility of such enlightenment poses a major threat to extremist groups such as Boko Haram.

Though we dream and yearn for the miracle of immediate solutions, I know that change does not occur by magic, nor does it take place overnight; rather it requires the dedication of time and relentless collective effort. My mother's death is a product of unjust societal norms that facilitate perverse gender inequality. A society's customs are engineered by its past generations, and in the same fashion its future citizens can redefine the culture that rules them by cultivating a new norm through education.

I am an optimist, and I believe it is possible to change the world, to better the status of women globally and particularly in places like Nigeria. This is not because I am naive or unaware of the shortcomings of many efforts to effect change. My optimism stems from a desperate place -- a core belief that the world as a whole, leaders and citizens, must awaken to the urgent need to end injustice against women. For me, necessity and possibility have become synonymous because living with the consequences of gender inequality makes it all the more obvious that change is imperative.

While my heart bled over the sorrow captured in the "Bring Back Our Girls" cry for help, my mind desperately indulged in a renewed hope that Nigeria might no longer ignore the agony of women and girls. Unfortunately, it often takes the presence of pain to garner the passion of a nation to vehemently advocate for change and demand action by its government. Although Boko Haram is perceived as an opponent to progress, the greater obstacle lies in a broader reluctance to take action in protecting girls in Nigeria who simply want an education.

Nigerian girls, like my sisters and I, desire and deserve for our aspirations of becoming valued members of society to be realized. Education is the vehicle towards living this dream.

About the author: Raised in Nigeria, Nnenna Agba gained popularity when she went on the widely watched television show America's Next Top Model. With hard-won scholarships, she graduated from Texas A&M University with a Bachelor's degree in Chemistry. She also holds a Master's of Science degree in Urban Affairs. Nnenna is supporting the education of her four sisters in Nigeria and is the face of Kechie's Project, an NGO that provides scholarships to girls from Nigerian schools.

This blog post is part of a HuffPost series in collaboration with UN Women, in recognition of the 20th anniversary of the adoption of the Beijing Declaration and Platform for Action.