HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

 Good Morning Beautiful women!! HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!! Whether you are one already, expectant or still in God's 'waiting room', you are all still  mothers.

Let's embrace this role. Let's encourage and motivate ourselves. It is not an easy job and even when our husbands don't praise us as often as they should (if they praise at all), let us still pat ourselves at the back. It is a natural talent and a blessed one at that. Our children know these, even our grandchildren, and that is why they do not hesitate in telling us those magic words, "Mummy, I love you".

The future our family and our children lie strongly in our hands and therefore, we shouldn't falter in correcting and guiding them every step of the way. We shouldn't see our children as a burden too heavy to carry. 

I attended a 'Mothers Day' celebration at a friends school (TOTS N' COTS CRÈCHE AND PRESCHOOL), and I was amazed at the turnout of mothers at the event. It showed that we care about the turnout of our children and the society as a whole. Mothers learnt a lot of skills such as 'How to apply makeup' and 'How to tie gele'....pictures coming soon.

Have a blessed day as we are celebrated all over the world! 

*rushing to church to dance and shake my waist*

GRANDPA WANTS TO DIVORCE GRANDMA BECAUSE OF SEX!

*Hehehe* Please forgive my ignorance...I never thought that 'sex' should or would be an issue at a certain age. So even 'andropausal' men and menopausal women quarrel about sex?!

Shouldn't Grandpa and Grandma be working out a retirement plan or catering to the needs of their grandchildren rather than fighting over sex?! Grandpa,  this kind of excessive activity can lead to cardiac arrest O!

Just read about how the issue of sex wants to destroy how-many-years of marriage! ...

An elderly couple decided to end their marriage as the wife refuses to have sex with her husband, while he complains that she does not cook for him anymore.

Mrs. Simbiatu Oduntan, 69, a housewife from Lagos, told Orile Agege Customary Court on Wednesday that her husband Alhaji Mustairu Oduntan, 84, wants to divorce her as she had lost her urge for sex. She adds that she suggested that he takes another wife.

Earlier, Mr. Oduntan told the court that he was "tired" of their marriage, his wife does not care for him, as she would not cook food, and "goes out and comes back at will". On her part, the wife said she could not cook because of health issues: her legs become swollen if she stands for too long.

The Oduntans have been married for 45 years and have four children aged from 25 to 18. The woman, a trader, supports her husband's decision to end the marriage.

The court president adviced the couple to maintain the peace, and adjourned the case till May 15 for further judgment.

*this matter tire me*

NIGERIAN MEN IN DIASPORA KILLING THEIR NIGERIAN WIVES

Just when I am trying to get over losing my dear friend to the cold hands of death in the United States, a friend sent me a link that gave a list of deceased women, also in the states, whom their so called husbands killed!

This information should be regarded as a wake up call to those out there and loved ones still in Nigeria. Please, Please and Please!!! Try and make use of all the God given senses we have to detect any change in behaviour of your spouse. If you sense 'a rat' or something 'fishy', do not hesitate to let someone closest to you know, better still your closest relative. Even if you don't love yourself,  think of your children and those who love you genuinely. You don't have to suffer Domestic Violence just because of what your culture says or your religion. SAVE YOU FIRST! SAY NO TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE OR INTIMATE PARTNER VIOLENCE!

In recent times reports of Nigerian men killing their wives has increased in the United States.

Few weeks ago a 33 year old Babatope Owoseni was arrested in East Orange, New Jersey in connection with the death of his wife who was nine months pregnant at the time of her death.

26 year old Fatoumata Owoseni was found unresponsive at the 39 South Munn Avenue apartment she shared with Babatope. The police have not released information on how he allegedly killed her. Babatope has been charged with her murder and is being held without bail at the Essex County Corrections Facility.

This cancer of wife killing by Nigerian husbands is fast spreading, and the Nigerian society is getting numb and used to it, as one of the social maladies of our times.  A heinous act, which hitherto would be very abominable that people are shocked to their bone marrows, is today seen with minimal indifference.

Few years ago, another Nigerian Mr. Kelechi Charles Emeruwa, 41, from Old Umuahia, Abia State, was charged with, and convicted of the first-degree murder of his estranged wife, 36-year-old Registered Nurse, Chidiebere Omenihu Ochulo.  Kelechi had finally lost it and stabbed his wife, with her own kitchen knife, so many times that the fountains of blood left on Julius Caesar paled in comparison, until she gave up the ghost.

Chidiebere had just returned from her father’s funeral in Nigeria.  Kelechi had protested vehemently to what he described as a lavish burial, of course, she wouldn’t hear any of it after-all she made the money.  She had the misfortune of returning to an angry, frustrated maniacal husband who took her kitchen knife to her and carved her up. It was on New Year’s Day, in her townhouse in the 4200 block of Dunwood Terrace, in the Silver Spring suburb of Burtonsville in Montgomery County, Maryland.

Recently In Tennessee, a Nigerian man after taking it for so long, lost his cool and shot his Registered Nurse wife as well as his hitherto mother in-law to death with a shot gun. According to the account this RN wife was married from Nigeria a pauper and brought to the United States by this man, who trained her in school as a registered nurse. Soon after her qualification, the demon in her was let loose and it became one torment after another, with one police call after another followed by sleep-over in police cells and it went on and on ad infinitum. After a protracted battle with the authorities at the wife’s instigation, this man lost his almost nearly paid-off home to his wife, including the custody of his three kids by her. He sees these kids just periodically according to court’s order and at the discretionary behest of the wife who sometimes comes to the appointed custody visitation ground at a time of her choosing; just to punish and suffer this man. He could not take it any longer and now the rest is history with two women shot dead and the killer in death row awaiting the electric chair.

Not too long ago, also, in Euless, a suburb of Dallas, another frustrated Nigerian husband, 45-year old Johnny Omorogieva from Edo State, Nigeria murdered his RN wife, Mrs. Isatu Omorogieva, 35, also of Edo State by savagely striking her on the head numerous times with a hammer in the full view of their 7-year old screaming daughter.

In Tulsa, Oklahoma a yet to be fully authenticated report has it that another Nigerian man recently bludgeoned his RN wife to death while she was fast asleep; following a traumatic life which she has subjected him to since turning into the majority bread winner of the family following her graduating from a nursing program.

Another Nigerian nut-case, Mr. John Onwuka, 49, from Akwete community of Ohafia Bende Local Government Area of Abia State was charged with one count each of homicide and use of a knife in the commission of a felony. He stabbed his RN wife of twenty five years, Mrs Gloria Uchechi Anya Onwuka age 42, fourteen times in her bedroom while she was getting ready to go to work. She was a nurse manager. Mr. John Onwuka committed this crime on the night of Saturday August 19, 2006 at the home of his wife in Estate Drive, Farmington, Hampton, Virginia with her children watching him act out his gory insanity.

"Yes I have killed the woman that messed my life up! A woman that had destroyed me. I am at Shalom West, my name is Michael and am all yours". With those words - a 911 call placed to the authorities, another Nigeria man has joined the infamous heinous club of Nigerian Men Wife Killers. Fifty year old Mr. Michael Collins Iheme  of Hennepin Minnesota placed the call above few minutes after shooting his twenty eight year old wife, Mrs. Anthonia Eberechi iheme, the mother of his 4 year old boy and 3 year old girl, to death.

HORRORS! IMAGINE AN OLD MAN BEING ATTRACTED TO YOUR TEENAGE DAUGHTER!!

I just had to share this because it can happen to any of you who have teenage daughters and who like to employ male lesson teachers for your female child. *I know it cannot happen to me sha!*

Read on and feel free to share your 'opine'!

I'm a 32-year-old single male teacher from a small community near Abuja. I really don't know what to do and if I should somehow to stop thinking those thoughts, or go see a doctor, or hand in myself to the police.

I have had few past relationships with girls my age, but they weren't satisfied with my being too involved in school work and, of course, in the small amount of money I get.

I'm teaching small children, both boys and girls, aged 10-12. I never feel any unhealthy urges towards them, I swear by God.

However, when I see my neighbour's 14-year-old daughter, I often start thinking improper thoughts about her. I feel attracted to her, both physically and emotionally. As I am on friendly terms with her parents, they trust me to help her in some school subjects. I don't allow myself to make any sexual references when we're alone in the room (her dad would often sit in the kitchen waiting for us to finish), but I also feel she's interested in me, too. She's so young and innocent, her sexuality has just started to blossom, of course she would be interested!

I feel so guilty for this. Should I change my place of residence? But I've grown fond of the kids I'm teaching, the accomodation is good... Or should I just wait until she comes of age and see if she wants a relationship with me? I'm too afraid and embarrassed to talk to our Pastor, or seek any medcial help. Maybe someone with an unbiased opinion would give a suitable advice? Thank you.

*I am sorry O Mr Man, but God punish you where ever you are! You better carry your forsaken 'paedophilic' a#$e somewhere else!*

NOT A BAD IDEA TO HAVE 'PURITY' BALLS IN NIGERIA

Was scouring through the net and stumbled on this hilarious article. As unrealistic as it sounds, it's not a bad idea. Maybe rather than the 'ball' thingy which doesn't sit well with our Nigerian culture, we will just call it 'PURITY VOWS'!

Before I go ahead and post the article, I would like to correct a piece of information in my last article "GONE WITH THE WIND (A TRIBUTE TO A FRIEND) where I wrote that my lovely friend Issy was shot in her sleep ( though it won't bring her back to life and with no intent to make her monster husband look 'good' in the public eye). Information came to me via mail from a true and accurate source, that she wasn't shot in her sleep but actually during a extremely heated argument between the couple. THIS IS STILL NOT A JUSTIFIED REASON TO TAKE ANOTHER LIFE!!!

Now the article....

Purity balls have become a phenomenon in America, now taking place in 48 out of the 50 states. A girl pledges to remain "pure" until her wedding day, symbolically "marries" God and promises her father that she will remain a virgin until she's a wife.

The balls resemble giant wedding ceremonies, with the girls - all around the age of 12 - wearing white gowns and dancing with their fathers who promise to "protect" their daughters' chastity.

During the ceremony, fathers present their daughters with purity rings, which they wear to symbolise their commitment to virginity. In the movement, purity means no sexual contact of any kind, including kisses, until after marriage.

The concept of purity pledges exists in over 17 countries and across America, blossoming from the original purity movement that began in the USA in the 1980s. Adolescent members of church groups began taking vows of abstinence and wearing rings to symbolise their commitment as a backlash to the perceived sexual liberation of the past decades and the growing AIDS epidemic.

They soon began wearing rings to symbolise their commitment, but the idea of girls giving their virginity to their father to safeguard until marriage, and the ceremonial purity balls, developed much later in alliance with Evangelical church movements.

*Lol! Nigerian chudren go gree?!*

But my question is, " If the girl wants to get married, how does she break the vow? Does she go through the 'divorce' process?!"

#justasking

GONE WITH THE WIND (A TRIBUTE TO A FRIEND)

Issy dear, I never in my wildest dreams thought I would be writing this...what is this exactly?? Is this supposed to be a 'love' letter to a long lost friend or an ode to a friend whom I will never see again or just a way of finding closure?

I remember the first day I met you back in our 'jambite' days, how talkative, how so full of life and extremely emotional you were. And out of everyone, you chose me as your 'bestie'.

I remember how immediately you stepped intoa room, everyone whether blind, deaf and dumb would know that "Isioma is 'ere"!

You were too friendly to a fault. Everyone was your friend. You always had something say...Isioma had to have the last word. You were so witty, so intelligent. And the most amazing thing about you was how you had the propensity to forget easily any hurt done to you...but not until you have said your mind!

For these reasons, I can't imagine why anyone would want to hurt you talkless of murdering you in your sleep! What a cowardly bastardly act. He knew the only way he could get you was in your sleep! He knew you were much stronger than him.

I or rather we (because I wasn't the only one who searched for you) should have know something was amiss when you suddenly stopped updating your facebook page. 

Now, you see, all I have left of you are memories, plain old memories. Memories of you smiling, laughing...oh! that laugh! Issy, you sure knew how to laugh. Who didn't know Isioma and her laughter!

Though I know you've gone with the wind and are safe wherever you are where no one can ever hurt you again, I can't help but think that you will suddenly update your facebook page and tell us that you are still alive and well. 

You have made only realise that DEATH is only too real and sure. When? I cannot say. I am left to ponder on my remaining days on earth and leave an impact on people's lives, just as you did.

Issy baby, keep resting in the Lord and I pray your parents and Uche, as well as your beautiful kids find solace in God. 

CHECK IF YOU OR SOMEONE AROUND YOU HAS TUBERCULOSIS

#CelebratingWorldTuberculosisDay

Hi lovely people...a pleasant cold and rainy day!!...oh!I have been waiting for this moment.

Now, back to the matter. Today is World Tuberculosis (TB) Day and I think I owe it to you guys to bring information about this deadly infectious disease right at your doorstep. *Let those who have ears listen and those who have eyes read O!*

A lot people we may know are walking around with this disease without even knowing it. TB doesn't only affect the lungs, as people might think. It can affect other parts of the body such as the skin, abdomen, bones, etc.

TB is caused by the bacteria Mycobacterium tuberculosis. Everyone and anybody can contact it but certain people are at a risk of getting TB which include:

- those who have never received the BCG immunisation especially at birth.

- those with really low immunity such as in HIV/AIDS, Diabetes, kidney diseases,    certain cancers, malnutrition,  etc

- people who live in extremely poor conditions such as in an over crowded rooms.

- travelling to countries that have high rates of TB

- health workers

- refugee camp or shelter

-  contact with chronic coughed ( so make sure you are not harbouring someone who has been coughing for donkey years in your house, even if the person is your relative)

How do you know if it is TB?

The person may have any or all the following:

- cough that has gone on for more than 3 weeks

- chills

- night sweats

- unexplained or unintentional weight loss

- loss of appetite

- coughing up blood ( no matter how small)

Now if TB affects other parts of the body, other complaints will come up but, if you are sure you are losing weight without coughing,  still visit the doctor.

If you don't see a doctor even with all these signs, be sure you are asking for trouble. The TB can become complicated and that is as good as been dead!

Remember TB has a cure. For those of you who are on treatment, please for God's sake, ensure you take your drugs appropriately to the end or  else the TB will be resistant to the original medications, and therefore become more difficult to treat.

Has anyone lost a loved one from TB? Please if you have, share your experience so that some 'doubting thomases' will understand that this is a serious matter!

YOU DON'T NEED A HUSBAND WHEN YOU ARE THE HUSBAND!

Some women matter just tire me. Some marry to live a happily-ever-after kind of life while some just got married to SUFFER! Day in, day out, na so so cry...all sorts of cry; cry for money, cry for husband's behaviour, cry for children, even cry for their life!

Please, can someone explain to me why some men are afraid to live up to their responsibilities.The women that marry them, practically shoulder all the responsibilities - from paying house rent to paying school fees to buying clothes, down to attending to the needs of the house. The funny thing about these men, is not that they they lost their jobs, but because, they are just chronically and cancerously LAZY! And the women, their wives contribute to it. These kind of men or 'husbands' (because I don't consider them as one) are known to me as 'DESIGNER HUSBANDS' or 'MEN IN HEELS'. Yes O! Designer husbands or Men in Heels... the women marry them just to worship and adore them, as well as to answer 'Mrs' and bear children for them.

The most annoying thing about these 'Designer Husbands' or 'Men in Heels' is that, despite the fact they do not contribute a 'pfennig' in the marriage, they misbehave seriously. They are the ones that beat their wives up, consume the most exotic food and womanise.

Now, when the pastors tell women who are widows to get up for prayers and then the women with designer husbands get up too, these men shouldn't be shocked. Are these women not as good as being widows?!...Mscheew!

See, I need to be disproved. You are not a designer husband if the following does not occur in your home:

- your kids run to your wife first for their needs (Trust me, the kids definitely who the 'money shaker' is in the home)
- you don't give her monthly feeding allowance, pay the rent or pay school fees
- you don,t have a job and don't want to get one because you collect pocket money from your wifey!
- you go on a family outing and your wife is the one that settles the bill.

The list is endless joor.

My final word on this matter is that."You men should change please and stop wearing high heels that belong to the women, look for a 'Salvatore Ferragamo' for men!

Tanks and av a nice day!

'SPIRIT HUSBAND' AS A CAUSE OF INFERTILITY!

Wonders will never cease.

This infertility of a thing has caused a lot of problems so much so that people formulate reasons for infertility. And you know the amazing thing about this problem, is that the man is usually never seen as the one with the problem...it is always the woman. The only time the man is seen as the one with the problem is when both partners submit themselves for necessary investigations. But once couples get married and no baby within the first 1 year (what am I saying sef...2 months) of marriage, all 'eyeses' will be on the woman.

That is how I met a woman who visited the clinic with all sorts of complaints, only for me to explore more and found out that her problems bordered around 'having a child'. *Bia, why is it always the woman that worries first?!* Anyway, her problem is not getting pregnant but keeping it. So far, since 3 years of being married, she has lost 9 pregnancies. Her husband took her everywhere you can imagine (except a good hospital) and then they eventually ended up in a spiritual home, where it was revealed that she was married to a 'spiritual husband'.

Can you believe that this woman truly believed she was married to a spiritual husband and so for 2 years since the diagnosis was made, she didn't bother seeking proper help. During this period, her husband moved out of their matrimonial home, got married to another lady and now has 2 kids with her! So, out of frustration, this my female patient started 'testing' her fertility! So far she has had 5 casual partners and ended up with a PID (Pelvic Inflammatory Disease) which has further complicated her situation. Now that she wants to settle down with her 6th partner who apparently loves her, the pregnancies she was getting in abundance is not even coming again. *Woman, no vex but at this juncture, I fitn't help you as your case has entered 'Gobe'!*

As much as I hate to admit that there may be spiritual causes of infertility, medical causes of miscarriages need to be explored properly, especially when such pregnancies occur in early stages of pregnancy (say < 12 weeks). It may be that:
- The woman has some Nutritional Deficiency. There are certain minerals and vitamins the woman needs in abundance to be able to have a well-formed baby such as Folic Acid  and Vitamin B6 and B12.
- It occurred Naturally. Nature has a way of aborting pregnancy that didn't form well.
- The Drugs she used or uses caused the miscarriage. That's why it's always good to get a doctor's prescription or see a doctor as soon as you miss your period. 
- Infections from Rubella, Measles and others that the woman might be unaware of.
- The woman has a Genetic Disorder that just doesn't allow a baby form.
- The woman has an Abnormally-formed Womb. One can never know this except if you do specialised investigations such Ultrasound scan, Hysterosalpingogram (HSG), etc and believe me when I say, you can't find this in a 'babalawo' house. So, go to a proper hospital!

The list is endless but the take-home is that, as couples, you shouldn't jump into the conclusion of 'spiritual tinz' when you haven't even visited a proper physician. As for the lady who her husband said was married to a spiritual husband, it turned out that she was severely Nutritionally deficient and had 2 wombs that were abnormally shaped!

ALL YOU WIVES THAT WANT LONG HAIR...THE SECRET REVEALED!

OMG! ...finally found the secret to a long and luscious hair! You guys don't have to buy Brazilian, Funmi, Peruvian hair or any other person's hair!

Whether you’re in the midst of trying to recover your strands from a misguided cut or simply want longer locks, you may have a hard time patiently waiting for your hair to grow. (We’ve been there.)

Luckily, unlike the watched pot that never boils, concentrating on your hair growth can yield actual results, particularly when it comes to strategic eating. Here are eight foods that help lengthen your mane, recommended by Harvard and Yale Medical School-trained nutritionist, Jayson Carlton, PHD and licensed nutritionist and fitness chef Mira Calton, CN.

1. Salmon: This fish is loaded with the strong hair supporters like Vitamin D and protein, but it also contains omega-3 fatty acids that promote hair growth by keeping your scalp healthy.

2. Yellow Peppers: Yellow bell peppers have nearly five and a half times more vitamin C than oranges (341 milligrams, as opposed to 63). This is good news for your locks since vitamin C is an antioxidant that strengthens the hair shaft and hair follicles, as well as prevents breakage.

3. Oysters: Zinc deficiency has been noted to cause hair loss and poor scalp conditions and oysters are loaded with zinc — just three ounces contain 493 percent of your daily value. But not just any oysters will do: Steer clear of the ones caught in the Gulf of Mexico, which may contain unusually high levels of Cadmium due to the 2010 BP oil spill.

4. Eggs: Eggs are an excellent source of those aforementioned omega-3s, and they are also contain biotin (which many people trying to grow their hair take in supplement form). But, just so you’re aware, it’s not the egg white that will make your hair long and beautiful, it’s the yolk. Eating too many egg whites can actually block the absorption of biotin into the body, causing a depletion of this micronutrient.

5. Sunflower Seeds: Just a few little seeds can supply you with an abundance of vitamin E, which will enhance blood flow to the scalp and promote faster hair growth.

6. Sweet Potatoes: These are loaded with beta carotene, the precursor for vitamin A that not only promotes a healthy scalp but  promotes hair growth. But choose foods loaded with beta carotene over supplementing with high doses — like over 2500 milligrams — of vitamin A from retinol since it can be toxic at very high levels.

7.  Avocados: Due to their high concentration of essential fatty acids naturally found in skin cells (which help to keep your skin smooth and supple), avocados are an age-old beauty secret. When topically applied to the hair and scalp, they have the added ability to stimulate collagen and elastin production. Mix a little avocado with sour cream (which contains lactic acid to help exfoliate dead skin and clean up buildup on the scalp) and apply to your hair and scalp for about ten minutes before washing it off.

8. Almonds: These nuts will make your hair grow faster and thicker due to their high biotin content. One cup contains nearly one-third of your daily requirement. You should be able to see the results in a month or two of adding them to your diet.

Culled from Women's Health.

MARRY ME AND MY KID(S) OR FORGET IT!

I don't get why some women with kids settle for less! I mean, how can you accept to marry a man who won't accept your kids? It's crazy! So, because you want to 'die' in his arms, you agree to dump your kids with your mum or any other relative!

Heelllooo?! If you claim you LOVE the lady (remember the key word here is LOVE), then it's only natural for you to love every baggage she comes with, including the chickens, goats and rats in her yard! If you can't afford to do that, then you don't really send her, what you actually  send is her v@#*%a!

Any lady who can't see that something 'fishy' is going on, when she has to hide her better halves from the man she wants to spend the rest of her desperate life with, must be seriously retarded or spiritually blind. Every woman born of a woman should understand what I am saying. Why would you suffer to have kids and then hide them from a so-called 'spineless' man who is not ready to step up to his responsibilities! Do you think those kids don't know what is going on? They have just probably accepted their fate all because they want their mother to be happy (talk about sacrifice. Now that is love) but this same mother is not ready to sacrifice her love for her new found man for the love of her children. She is ready to do anything just to be with the 'Idiat'!

I remember a young girl I met sometime ago during one of my busy clinics, she presented with all sorts of complaints that really didn't add up! At the end of the day, she had so much anger inside, which she had bottled. She had resentment for her mother who abandoned her with her Grandmother and had gone ahead and remarried. Her mother had 2 more kids for that husband and so, had more or less rebuilt her life into a perfect one. The girl is 16 years old and anytime she visits her mother, not only does she feel like an 'outsider', she sees how 'complete' the family is. She can't understand why her mother won't bring her into the family. Going back home to Grandma only drives home the reality of being an 'unwanted' child.

You may ask why she couldn't go to her father, but that one sef don settle himsef! Till date, she still dey behave like person wey dey possessed despite seeing a clinical psychologist. Me, I know she will continue to behave funny until she enter a real family wey get 'mama' and 'papa'.

So, on a final note women, please, please and please, do not rush to marry a man who no wan gree use eyes see ya chudren. #Remember the story of one lagos pastor wey marry one beautiful woman wey don already born 3 chudren, but the pastor, as i hear am O, no gree to use eyes see those beuriful chudren, so tey the woman go dump dem with her sister!

Kudos to all the men that marry women with kids and who take good care of them, my God will never disappoint you. Your pockets will never go dry. You will live long O! You are a true definition of a 'MAN'!

HELP! MY DAUGHTER IS HAVING AN AFFAIR WITH MY FRIEND' S HUSBAND.

Woah! I just got this in my mailbox and this reader needs your advice. Please O! Older mums with adult chudren, share your wisdom! * whistling and grinding pepper with mortar*

Dear NHW,
You are doing a great job and I really appreciate all the efforts you have been putting in encouraging our young wives and mothers. Please I have a pressing problem and it concerns my 25 year old daughter who just finished from a private university in Nigeria.

I just found out that my daughter is having an affair with a very close friend's husband. This my friend is like a sister to me. My friend is the same age as me, 50 years and I know the husband is about 5 years older. So that puts him at around 55 years of age.

My daughter just graduated and so is awaiting NYSC and because of this, she is usually at home alone. I work in the Ministry of Education and so I usually leave for work at 8am and close at 4pm. One day, I forgot the keys to one of my drawers and so had to come back home. Only for me to get to the house and I saw my friend's husband's car parked outside. I was wondering why he had come because my husband isn't around and he works in Abuja. I got really worried hoping that there was no problem. All sorts of things crossed my mind but not what I walked into!

I met my daughter and this man kissing and fondling each other!! I screamed "Blood of Jesus" and of course, that disentangled them. I broke down in tears and nothing could console me. I asked them why but they didn't reply. All the man did, was to pack his clothes and leave.

My daughter told me that they have been in this relationship for almost three years now. I didn't raise my daughter this way! I have told her to break off from this sin but you know what my daughter said to me? She says that they are way too deep into the relationship and can't break up just like that. That she would rather kill herself than leave him! My heart is full of sorrow.

I am not even sure if my friend is in the know. And if she is not and she finds out later that I know, how will she take it? I don't think I can bear the thought of knowing my daughter had a hand in her marital problems. I never dated a married man, so why is this happening to me?

Please NHW, publish this so that I can get an advice on what to do. A part of me is saying that I should expose my daughter so that she will be so disgraced and then leave somebody's husband. Another mind is telling me to protect her so that me myself will not be put to shame.

Help me O! Please O! My BP is rising slowly and I know it is because of this problem.

*Mummy, sorry. I can feel your pain because I am a mother too and I know how it would feel if my daughter did the same. There is nothing God can't do. Please try and get closer to your daughter and let her know the consequences of her action especially in the eyes of God. Fast and Pray too for I know God is not in support of this relationship. May God grant you the wisdom to handle this problem*

 

MOST NIGERIAN MARRIAGES ARE ROMANCE IMPAIRED

Hate me O ! for saying this...na you sabi! How many Nigerian men can boast of knowing what 'Romance' is? So how can you give what you have absolute lack of knowledge of! Ok, if you claim you give, why do our women wear long faces that scream "LONELY, BORED AND UNLOVED"? Why do you think they get easily swayed by other men's lies?!

One thing you men should know is that romance is the spice of a marriage. It's what keeps the marriage exciting. It doesn't have to expressed only on special days. Romance is a way of telling and showing the woman you are married to, that you appreciate her and glad that you will be spending the rest of your life with her.

Are you still arguing? If you insist that you are 'Romanus' *Hehehehe*, then, do you do any of the following for her?:
- when was the last time you got her a surprise gift? (Remember I said it musn't be on a special occasion) Even if it is one apple...buy! #akagumtinz
- when was the last time you guys went on a trip together, just you and her?
- when was the last time you offered to serve her breakfast in bed (assuming you made the breakfast O!)
- have you offered to do the laundry, cook, manny-sit the kids, take her shopping???
- do you call her at odd times during working hours and tell her sweet nothings or send sexy messages?
- have you ever in your wretched  life (sorry, getting carried away. Excuse my French) sent her sexy messages and words of appreciation?
- have you ever offered to massage her tired feet and bunched up shoulders?

Mscheeew!

But NO, it had to be all about you! You! You! You! You leave her with nothing but criticisms and negative judgements. How she didn't do this for you or that for you.

You know a few words or actions of encouragement filled with love, may be all she needs to stay motivated in the marriage and show more love! Instead, you men would rather invest in 'home-wreckers' who are cursed (and the person wey curse dem sef, probably don die!).

Please, you guys should try abeg! I am sure your wives are trying joor!

BE CAREFUL, YOU MIGHT BE MARRIED TO A JOHNNY!!

Choi!! I just love Yemi Alade's song "Have you seen Johnny?!" As much as some wives don't want to accept the truth, they might be married to a 'Johnny'...You are asking me how?...Ok, read on.

If your husband does any of the following, *I swear beating my hands on the ground*, he must be a 'Johnny':
- When your husband leaves home in the morning wearing male perfume and returns at night reeking of different perfume, specifically male. *Don't believe him if he says it was his sister that hugged him*

- When our dear hussy has to leave the room almost everytime to receive an 'important' call.

- When darling hussy comes back almost every night with a full tummy...no need to talk much!

- When and if your hussy rushes to the bathroom for a quick shower (and he is working an office job O!) and assuming he doesn't usually do this.

- When dear hussy has several email / social media accounts!

- When they 'password' everything, laptop, ipad, blackberry, Facebook, twitter, etc

- When they start asking unusual questions like "Is it possible to marry only one wife?" or "Is it possible to love more than one person?"

- When they suddenly become preoccupied with their appearance

- When they keep getting mysterious calls at odd hours of the day or loads of 'wrong' numbers

- When you see that the passenger seat is always adjusted!

- When buying gas or getting credit takes more than 5 hours for something that should ordinarily take 15 minutes

- When he perpetually goes on a business trip ...almost every weekend. You too, pack your bag and follow him, noting do you!!

- When you keep seeing strange messages from strange women and the permanent excuse your husband gives is,"We are just friends"

- When housekeeping money is suddenly cut and he doesn't  perform his financial duties.

- When you call him sometimes and you hear kids at the background...and no candid explanation for that when he is not even a Paediatrician!

Infact, the list is endless. All I am saying is that, we 'gurls' should be careful and not be taken unawares... When you find out that you are married to a 'Johnny', then you should work hard at exposing him because the other women might not even be aware of his deceit.

8 YEAR OLD COMMITS SUICIDE

OMG!! This is really heartbreaking! I just read this. This is an issue that needs to be investigated. Please read on...

On Monday, a young 8 year old Nsukka girl has allegedly commited suicide in the bathroom of her family's compound home at Red House Bus Stop, Ofolonu Road, Nsukka, Enugu State.

According to a witness the girls body was found around 3.20 pm hanging from a wood in the bathroom.

He said:"I was surprised because I saw the girl playing with other children when I was going out to buy something from the market. "I wonder what will make an eight-year-old to commit suicide.

"Another thing that surprised me is that the two legs of the child were on the ground, which is not normal when one commits suicide; the legs should be dangling,'' she said.

The police meanwhile has been urged to investigate the mysterious passing of the child because witness feels that the rope on the child's neck was "not strong enough to kill her, if really she committed suicide''. "I know the police investigation will unravel the real circumstance behind the suspected suicide,'' she said.

The victim's guardian, Mr. David Ajibo, told NAN that the child lived with him, adding that she was the daughter of his brother in-law.

"This girl has been staying with us since her father died. I am shocked as I do not know what to say; only God knows what happened.

"She was hale and hearty when I left the house in the morning, and I wondered what would make a girl of eight to commit suicide,'' he said.

Contacted, Mr Ebere Amarizu, Enugu State Police Public Relation Officer (PPRO), confirmed that the girl allegedly hung herself in the bathroom, adding that the police had commenced investigation into the incident.

"The corpse of the deceased is now deposited at the Bishop Shanahan Hospital mortuary in Nsukka,'' he said.

* This matter should be thoroughly investigated. I am not saying it doesn't happen but for an 8year to commit suicide, something grave must have pushed her to do it. The only thing that comes to mind is CHILD ABUSE especially SEXUAL ABUSE!! *

 

WHEN SHOULD SIBLINGS STOP SLEEPING IN THE SAME ROOM?

Top of the day to you guys!!

Na wah for you people...nobody has asked for my Lenten posts experience, instead what people are asking for are gossip columns, gists and more gists!! SMH for you people....you better give your life to Christ! LOL! Bia, whether una like am or not, I will post the remaining 4 (since we are on Day 7), even if I have to force it down your throat! *Hehehe*

See, I am deeply concerned about what seems to be going on in homes and a lot of mothers are pretending that it doesn't exist! A lot of young boys who are in their adolescent age seem to be experimenting with their younger sisters sexually.

Apart from the one I have been hearing about, an incidence occured sometime ago, whereby a young girl of about 14years old was rushed to the emergency room by her parents. Her complaint was basically acute abdominal pain of sudden onset. A diagnosis could not be ascertained and when an emergency ultrasound was about to be performed, lo and behold, the girl pushed out a live female child!! Her mother fainted out of shock while her father's eyes, just like everyone else present, remained wide open!! During all this 'qwanta' her 17 year old brother was still in school oblivious of what was going on.

After all the noise had settled, the major exam question was asked, "Nne, who give you belle?" Na so the girl confess say na her brother!! That he had been sleeping with her for 2years now but it started with fondling for about a year! I can't count how many times the girl's mother fainted. 
Any way according to her parents, they noticed the kids were too close for comfort but they tried not too attach too much meaning to it. That they noticed they played with each other in inappropriate ways to the extent that the girl will seat on her brother's lap one time too many..

Please, parents, let us try and shine our eyes O! Anytime our spirit tells us that something is amiss somewhere, abeg address that issue with immediate alacrity because that your 'later' might be 'too late'!! 

MY LENTEN EXPERIENCE(DAY 3): TRULY SORRY LORD...

My kids think I have been acting up lately. In my son's words,"Mummy, what's up with you? You've been acting weird for the past few days. Please, I need my old mummy back!" I chuckled in my mind...ko le ye won (they cannot understand).

My son I am in 'Penitential mode'! I am in a truly-sorry-for-my-sins mode!

I learnt today, that for women to truly run their homes efficiently and effectively, we need to improve our relationship with God and this would entail being truly sorry for our sins. And when we do this, we begin to see things differently in our marriages. Even when our spouse is being unreasonable, we tend not to 'go there' with him or her. We also find out that, you become calm over things that would normally create some mental discomfort.

I have resolved to practice some mortifications in my daily task as a mother and as a wife; from the minute I get up from bed (even when I don't feel like it) to going to work to making dinner. * You know all these small duties required of us as a mother and wife, can be a drag sometimes*

If I truly want to be sorry then, I will try to be cheerful in carrying out those duties ( not when I want to but when I need to). Here are some examples (which some of you might identify with):
- Getting the family to do a daily morning devotion even when your whole body is screaming TIRED!!
- Preparing meals for the family when what I actually want is to eat out.
- Giving my kids hugs and kisses when they demand for it and you are really not in the mood to be 'mushy mushy'.
- Actually listening, not just hearing our clients when we are at our peak of extreme nausea and disgust!
- Learning to control our thoughts and imaginations especially where our husbands are concerned (since no proof nah!)

So Lord, I am truly sorry and I hope you give me another chance during these fasting days...

MY LENTEN EXPERIENCE (DAY 2): CARRYING A 'CROSS' IN MARRIAGE

Sorry guys for just posting this today. Believe you me (or is it believe me you?...oh! whatever!) when I say, "I was EXTREMELY FAGGED OUT YESTERDAY" or should I say "I was RAPED TIRED, from too much work.

Ok back to the matter, let me just go ahead and share what I learnt yesterday (and trust me when I say 'fasting' no easy but God dey sha)...

I learnt that "there is no true Christian without the 'Cross'! Just like you can't say as a wife, that you have a good marriage without having gone through problems, trials and tribulations. Passing through these trial period is a true test of a good marriage. So literally, you don't qualify if you guys haven't been to hell and back!

I also learnt that, one of the clearest symptom of 'abandonment' of the Cross is LUKEWARMNESS. Lukewarmness in everything such as in prayer, getting house chores done at the right time, etc. It's like a cancer that slowly eats us up, thereby destroying our relationship with God.

We married couples really shouldn't go a day without embracing daily crosses. We must and should make sacrifices for each other. Examples include:
- Not quitting the marriage because a spouse has a terminal illness
- Sticking to each other in a childless marriage and not blaming each other.
- Quit trying to change an 'untidy' spouse and just do the tidying up yourself.
- Husbands being a 'manny' just for once in their miserable life!
- Wives staying up a bit late for husbands that like to come home late.
- Spouses paying each other compliments even if it kills you!
- Taking turns in doing school runs.
- Husbands cooking and serving breakfast in bed to their wives (please not the cursed and probably-dead-already girlfriends!)
- Husbands mopping, cleaning, sweeping, doing laundry...ok. I better stop now, getting carried away with my imaginations!
...but you get the drift sha!

When we abandon our marriage/homes in God's hands, He frequently permits us to taste sorrow, loneliness, opposition, slander, defamation and ridicule, inwards and outwards, just to mould us into His own image and likeness.

For every disappointment we get from husbands or kids, we should learn to accept the situation and then offer it up to God without complaining. A lot of wives have lost out in the experience of joy, because they simply abandoned their 'cross'. Not accepting your cross will bring you nothing but pain.

Therefore, let us please, please, please, learn to embrace our 'cross' with courage, asking our Lord to help us every step of the way, and I can assure you of a great end result. (Everyone knows, it's normal human nature to avoid anything that demands effort)

*So, my 'Cross', where art thou?...I so badly need you...to love and to cherish!*

TO REPORT OR NOT TO REPORT?

There is nothing someone no go see, read or hear! When I came across this, even me self no fit answer am...serious exam question!

Sha read, and share your opinion.

Hello! I seriously need help in this confused state that I am, what happened is that; few weeks back I caught my 53 years old stepfather sleeping with our 17years-old house maid exactly around 3am in her room. Although, I have been noticing that its each time I make night calls with my boyfriend abroad I do see my stepfather coming out of his matrimonial room and this has happened like up to four times.

I’ve been curious that what does this man always look for at night, all my mind was maybe he’s a ritualist or armed robber or maybe into shaddy business. So on this faithful day, I decided to stay up all night till around 3am, I saw my stepfather coming out of his room as usual, he went downstairs, I followed him thinking maybe he’s going out or a secret room in our house but to my own surprise he knocked on our house maid’s room and entered, how shocking, I couldn’t believe it. I hid myself in one corner thinking maybe he would come out after some minutes but this man didn’t come out, I had to go the maid’s door and I started hearing sound of moan coming out from the room. I opened the door and I found my stepfather and house maid in a very disturbing position (dog-style).

To cut the story short, my stepfather has been begging me with everything in this world, he brought a cheque of 200k in my room begging me not to tell my mum. I didn’t collect the money, I told him I would think about it.

I’m really confused now, I dunno if I should collect the money or tell my mother and also send the girl packing. My mother and stepfather has been married for 11 years now, they have 2 kids together. I’m confused, I’m a student I need money but won’t guilty conscience weigh me down if I didn’t tell my mother? Pls help me!

*so what do you guys think?..make e report or make e no report?*

Culled from 247Naija

AND THE EVIL CONTINUES...

I still don't get what is happening! Is someone trying to tell me that even if these so-called fathers are given maximum sentence, this 'evil' will still continue! You know, it's not hard...Dadas, if you are feeling horny, you can go get paid sex!!...but your daughter?!...c'mon!

See what I mean...

A middle aged man in Lagos has been arrested and charged to court after reports that he raped his teenage daughter.

42-year-old Pedro Anegbe is said to have stated that he raped the 15-year-old girl because a spirit asked him to do so in order to get a job.

The accused has been arraigned before a Magistrate court sitting in the Ebute Metta area of the state and is facing charges bordering on forceful sexual intercourse.

The incident is said to have occurred at the family home on Ifelodun Street in the Fatolu Ipaja area of Lagos.

The Investigating Police Officer, Bakare Murtala revealed the results of his investigation to the court.

He said:

“The defendant is the biological father of the girl. She told us her father had sexually harassed her. We questioned him on his daughter’s allegation and he confessed to the crime. He said he had raped her twice.”

Anegbe, while pleading innocent to rape, said he had started hearing the voice after he lost his job and it had told him to damage some things and rape his daughter.

Federal Government, please do something...hard and fast before these 'monster' dads consume our daughters!

SIBLINGS CAUGHT IN THE ACT!

Noting wey person no go see! #endtimes.

Dear Readers,

I’m finished! Until my current travails, I never imagined I would be sharing my horror story with you.

Last week, my husband’s eldest sister came to visit us. Her husband, the third one, left her about four months ago. Being very close to my husband, he invited her over.

She never really liked me so I wasn’t too pleased by his invitation. I am not his first wife. From what I gathered, she left because of this particular elder sister of my husband whose fondness for him made it difficult for her to stay. She left with her two children.

Having this at the back of my mind, I decided to play safe when it comes to issues affecting her.

So that day, I decided to close from the shop to cook her special meal. Since she would be staying for an indefinite period, I didn’t want issues whatsoever with her at all. Besides the entire family fear her. My husband is also responsible for the training of her children.

The fact that she doesn’t like me, made me very determined to avoid her stress especially as my husband would always take her side against me.

 I wasn’t ready for the scene I met in my living room. My husband and his elder sister were too caught up in their private world to notice my presence in the living room.

I don’t know if I screamed or shouted but they eventually disengaged. Rather than cover her nudity, she told me that I should go to blazes if I can’t cope with the knowledge of what I have witnessed.

To crown it all, my husband didn’t utter a word. Instead, he got up like a zombie went up into our room to clean up and sleep. When he woke up, he was his normal self asking me when I came home and to get his food.

I was very shocked by his reaction. When I started making trouble with him, he appeared so confused, further confusing me.

This woman is like the mother to them all. Their parents are both dead so there is really nobody in their family I can report the incident to. Besides, who will believe me? I don’t know who to turn to or how to go about this. The way both of them are carrying on, it is as if I imagined the situation. What can I do?

WHEN WILL SOME HUSBANDS BECOME 'MEN'?

Good morning peeps. Imagine waking up to read this article I am about to share with y'all. I found it particularly nauseating, and if you want disgusting! It still beats me how some women find such men attractive, not to talk of marrying such! Well, I have concluded that these group of couples are probably under a spell!

Anyway sha, read on...let me not use my own and spoil your mind.

Dear readers,
Please don’t crucify me, just read and advise.

My wife agreed to advertise herself for paid sex to help pay the bills. The idea of her having sex with someone else fascinated me but how I wish I could turn back the clock. I’m 31 and my wife’s 29. We have two young children. My salary at work has been reduced and it is a real worry with all the bills mounting up. My wife works part-time but wanted to help.

We thought her selling sex would be an easy way to make quick money. The idea fascinated me. I really enjoyed the thought of her having sex with someone else and getting well paid in return. Our first customer was a middle-aged man. I let him go up to the spare room with my wife and they spent an hour there together. The moment I let this man go upstairs the thought of my wife having sex with someone else killed me from the inside. I felt sick to my stomach.

I spent that hour sitting outside the room listening to them. After this first session I dropped the idea of any future customers. We set the money on fire as I didn’t want to spend it on us or my family.My wife was in tears as soon as the customer left. She didn’t want to do it and she later told me that she didn’t enjoy the sex. To her it was simply a business arrangement. We don’t know where to go from here. We are still desperate for money and can’t think of any other way to get more income.

Was it hard for me to bear because it was my first time? Will I get used to it as we attract more customers?Please help!

*So what do you guys think?*

HOW CAN A FATHER DO THIS?

It still beats me when I see parents, most especially fathers, who are supposed to be protecting their children, defiling them instead.

What will possess a father to look at his daughter lustfully, talk less of  sexually abusing her. It is pure evil and if you are a father doing it, you are possessed and need immediate deliverance!

Below is a typical example...

A 13-year-old girl is now confined to a wheelchair after her 55-year-old father repeatedly molested her.

Narrating her ordeal, the girl said her she was locked up by her father in a room where he had multiple sex with her. He then threatened her that she'd die if she ever told anyone about the incident.She said she kept the matter to herself until her mother who was at the time of the incident separated from her father came to her aid through the intervention of the Tema Main Harbour DOVVSU division.

According to the mother of the defiled victim, Eunice Otoo, after the ordeal, her daughter can no longer walk and is now confined to a wheel chair.

She is also wears diapers constantly as she has been suffering urinary incontinence since the incident took place.

Madam otoo is calling for the arrest of her husband so that justice can be served as this is the second daughter he has defiled.

She said she has no money to take her daughter to see a specialist as recommended by the medical doctor and is appealing to the public and to the hierarchy of the Domestic Violence and Victims Support Unit (DOVVSU) to come to the aid of her daughter.

May God help us O!

MY LENTEN EXPERIENCE: DAY 1

Today marks the beginning of Lent (a period during which I intend to pick up my cross and follow Christ). This goes beyond just being 'Catholic' as some of my friends would term it. It is about me proving myself as a true follower of Christ and his teachings. I am quite aware of the fact that it will last for 40 days (Yikes!!)

We married folks go through a lot in our marriages especially the women (Yep! You got that right...ain't nuffing to be ashamed of...I am a Feminist). I speak, live (dunno about the dying part though!) for the women and that is why we need this period of prayers, fasting and alms giving to strengthen our home front. This is a time to drop all the 'seserense' and 'shakara' and get serious with God!

Even if our husbands are the 'roof' and the 'foundation' of our homes, we should never forget that we are the 'pillars' that hold forth the home. So, I implore you beautiful, black, strong visionaries to join me in this long journey of prayer and fasting. I need to do this to stay motivated and encouraged. I have never made it to 40 and so I must this time, God-willing.

While I was walking through (I hope this grammar is right) Mushin (an area most people would consider to be a 'ghetto') today, I saw how 'beautiful' God is. This 'beauty' I speak about is supposedly the inner beauty. Growing up, Mushin is one place I dread to live because I know (or so I thought) I would never live in. My workplace ironically is in Mushin (depending on which entrance to the institution you drive into). I had some job to do in this 'ghetto' and of course, I wasn't planning to drive my car to where I needed to go. I parked by the gate of the institution and trekked.

As I walked through the streets, I must say I was scared (because you never know what to expect in a place like that lurking with miscreants, thugs and all). I could feel eyes peering at me but I chose to ignore. It was obvious I wasn't from that area...it's usually easy for them to tell!

 Like I said, I truly appreciated God in all honesty. I realised that we the supposed 'high-class' ones are ingrates as well as ignorant. Even with the fact these 'Mushin guys' lived in poverty, they seemed so happy, with no care in the world. I saw children (some obviously malnourished) with just panties or non at all, running along the road with total abandon. Even when my kids who are always fully clad leave just the house with improper shoes, I freak out ( I did an SMH for myself). I saw young kids scrambling for 50 naira rice, young girls fighting to get the attention of scruffy young men, each house selling practically what the next house was selling, noise everywhere, young men who obviously had no job gambling away, the entire area littered with garbage and reeking of urine...the list is endless and still these people were happy! Even with nothing...they seemed happy. It appeared to me, they were living each day as it comes. They knew tomorrow wasn't a promise and so they decided to entrust their lives in God's hands! What I saw were people who acted like 'there was more to life than just money'.

I think the walk I had was not by chance. I think God wanted me to see the other side of life that had 'nothing'. And even with nothing, there was still happiness. Overall, I could feel His presence there. Even in the midst of all the disorganization, confusion and poverty, God was and is there.

So the moral of this 'yarn' is that we should appreciate everything we have in our lives, no matter how small. We should also appreciate the presence of God in our midst so, no need to panic! I have resolved to do anything to get God's attention and love. *if you like stay dia dey jolous me, no join me dey fast!*

Please forgive me if I sound 'preachy' though I am not, I am just sharing.

Love you guys. Don't forget to follow me on Twitter@naijahousewife.

SEE HOW EVIL FRIENDS CAN BE...

My dears, Gudu money O! I wasn't planning to start the day with this kind of gist but I just feel I owe it to you guys to share this mind blowing revelation of a so-called friend! We women should really be careful and allow the holy spirit to guide us in choosing the right friend(s) (as the case maybe especially for people like us who like to pack all sorts!)

Dear readers,

I am a 42-year-old woman and I reside in Abuja Nigeria, after reading my confession you might insult me which is allowed but all I want is advice from you. I am single and you might wonder why at 42 I’m still single but my being single is because am waiting for the right time to take over my friends husband.

I have a friend called Aisha and we’ve been friends from childhood. She’s married with two kids. When Aisha got married I got so jealous because her husband is so rich and handsome. Aisha’s husband despite being married still hangout with other women and I’ve caught him on three different occasions in various hotels across the country.

I told my friend about it but instead of her believing me she chose to accuse me of trying to destroy her home. I got furious and made up my mind to prove to my friend that her husband is actually a cheat.

Aisha travels out of the country and I made a visit to her house late at night during one of those travels, claiming my car broke down on the road and so won’t be able to make it back home since its late her husband persuaded to drop me at my place that night but I insisted I will spend the night over . We talked and later I held him and demanded he make love to me if not I will tell his wife about all the affairs he’s been keeping. He was stunned when I noticed this I quickly pushed him on the couch and we ended up making love.

Unfortunately I got pregnant in the process which is what have been looking for. Now I’m 2months pregnant for him he promised to give me anything I want just to terminate the pregnancy but nothing on earth can equal me keeping my child to share part of his wealth so I told him sharing part of his wealth with my child is what I want.

Now with the pregnancy I can prove to my friend that her husband is a good for nothing man and a cheat too, I know she will put up a fight but I am ready to give her the fight of her life after all she shouldn’t be enjoying wealth alone. I am 42 and just can’t loose this baby am carrying for anything since menopause is around the corner.

Don’t you think I did the right thing by getting pregnant for her husband just to prove to her I was right about the allegations I made to her earlier, if I get rid of this pregnancy I might never get pregnant again am just confused on what to do since I didn’t mean to get pregnant all I wanted to do was just prove to my friend her husband is a cheat. Please advise me on what to do next.

*my own advice is that if it is the will of God for her to have that child, she should give her life to Christ and ask for her friend's forgiveness or else she will never know peace...lai! lai!*

Since today, being Ash Wednesday and which marks the beginning of Lent, I will be sharing with you my day-to-day experience of Lent.

pls follow me on Twitter@naijahousewife

LET'S FACE IT...LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH!

Let me start by apologising for my on and off blogging. Please do blame it on my extremely tight and busy schedule. But you know, it's not going to stop me from expressing my thoughts especially when I need and gats to vent!

Everyday, I sit my butt listening to the throes and woes of women, listening to their various versions of how money has affected their marriages in different ways. So, I have reached my verdict: LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH to bring happiness, peace and harmony in marriage.

Let's face it and I implore you to repeat after me...Money is good. Money is great. Money makes our husbands look all sooo 'manly' not to mention 'sexy'! If truth be told, every woman wants to be pampered silly with money. I am yet to meet a wife who will publicly denounce money. Even though I hate to say this, money has a way of making the marriage appear so blissful! *covering my face in shame*

I remember when one-time, I posted stuff on my Facebook wall, "Pure Love = love - money while True Love = love + money" and a lot of my female friends thought I was conceited.

To my fellow 'husbands of wives', the next time or anytime you tell your wives "I love you", please ensure that it is followed by wads of money. No vex. I am telling you guys this because:

- Love alone does not help cook a pot of soup.
- Love alone cannot clothe the wife and kids
-Love alone cannot pay house rent.
-Love alone does not pay school fees

So make una try abeg! God go helep una!

So, my fellow wives, don't ever give up. Have faith. If you feel like your patience is running out due to lack of money in the marriage, intensify your prayers. It is only  prayers that can lead you to the 'PROMISE LAND'  Sorry, did I just hear someone ask if I was already in the promise land. My answer is "Yes". And you know why? Because I am contented with where God has placed me.

May God help us in our journey through our marriages. Amen.

YOUR SOULMATE ISN'T WHO YOU THINK IT IS

Hi peeps. As usual, I was going through my Facebook and I saw a link to this beautiful piece on a friend's timeline...please enjoy! I am dedicating this to all my people in a 'loveless' relationship..

We all have our own romanticized notions of what it will be like when we find true love.

We imagine how it'll go. What it'll feel like. What he or she will look like, sound like, act like. Even kiss like. And every once in a while, we actually meet that person. There they are! In the bar standing next to us! Or down the hall at work! Or in the line at the bookstore! They're perfect. Everything we imagined. And so we engage. Chase. Pursue. And assume our very best behavior. And fight for a chance at that perfect union we've imagined in our heads for so long.

And sometimes it works! We get their phone number. And a date! And a second date! And sometimes it even goes a month or two! But then at some point, it runs afoul.

What once seemed effortless becomes arduous.

The perfect conversations suddenly don't flow as easily.

Something's gone awry. What once was easy is now work. And who has time for that?

And here's where many a relationship come to an unfortunate end.

Because the other person thinks it should only be constant magic. That anything else is merely a false symbol.

But we still chase them! We want it back! We think of what we can do to possibly salvage this sinking ship. Should we change ourselves? Adjust our behavior? Change our whole personality?

After all: this is love. Surely it's worth sacrificing for, no?

No, I'm here to say. It's not.

Because there's a big, horrible idea out there in the world of romance:

That if it's not hard, it's not real.

True romance must be earned, we believe. Struggled for. Barely survived.

If it comes easy, it's wrong. Shallow. Too simple.

We must suffer for love. We must cry with certain regularity. Lose our faith time and time again only to barely regain it.

I humbly submit that such a belief is the romantic equivalent of 100 percent grade-A bullshit.

Perhaps it comes from our culture's puritanical beginnings. The notion that anything great is worth suffering for.

And while I agree that love takes work, patience and forgiveness, I don't think it should involve perpetual, ongoing damage-control.

If the relationship you're in takes constant, multiple acrobatic maneuvers to keep it in flight, then it's not a relationship; it's a doomsday project.

Relationships, in general, should be easy.

If they're taking a ton of work, a ton of the time, something's wrong.

Chances are either that:

A) One (or both) of you is not a stable enough person to even be in a relationship to begin with, and you need to go off on your own to learn how to keep yourself perfectly happy with nothing more than yourself to sustain you. (And yes, I've been this unstable person myself.)

B) One of you has unrealistic expectations of what the other is supposed to provide them on a regular basis. (And yes, I've been this person, too.) They think you're supposed to keep them constantly entertained. Or wined and dined. Or sexually pleasured. Or emotionally rescued. Or financially bailed out.

Neither of which is sustainable.

Which is why I say the following:

Don't chase the person you can barely hold on to when you're at the top of your game.

Seek out the person you can be happy with even when you're having a bad day. Or week. Or month.

Because those days will happen, many, many times over the course of a relationship.

And the person who's only happy with you when you're a superhero will not stick around when you finally become a mortal again -- and need them to be there for you, instead.

So skip the supermodel. The pursuit of own your personal Jessica Alba or David Beckham. It might be heaven for a week or two, but they'd probably dump you as soon as you failed to be the emblem of perfection for more than 2-3 seconds in a row.

That perfect pairing with the Mister or Miss Right we've all imagined in our hearts isn't going to survive the endless ordinary days that real life is fraught with.

The person who's truly right for you is probably cleverly disguised as the one you work with every day. Or the one who you've casually known in your circle of friends for five years. Who has seen you at your best and at your worst. And is still there, a big believer in your immense potential. And is probably an amazing kisser if you'd just give them a chance.

That's the person it's going to be genuinely easy with over the long haul.

So the next time you're looking for the one, don't look up on some stage or pedestal for some shining realization of your fantasies. Turn around and look behind you. At the person you might have overlooked. The person who is quietly everything you need them to be and more, but might have missed.

You just have to give them a deeper look.

Culled from Huffpost by Mark Radcliffe.