OMG!! This s%@t is getting serious. When I hear stuff like this, I'm thinking "Okay, this happens like every 2 in 40 marriages!" I hope mails like this don't make our husbands start doubting us!
What am I talking about? Please read on, because this blog reader needs your advice before she dies from too much thinking!
Dear NHW,
I am so distraught right now. I don't think I can carry on with this burden in my heart.
I am married to a wonderful man and have been for 15 years now. My husband has done nothing but shower me and the kids with love and gifts. If I say we have 5 children, I will be lying because out of the 5 kids, only 1 belong to him, my daughter who just turned 2 years old.
How do I start? My husband is a Chemical Engineer who has been working for an Oil Company even before I met him. But we never really enjoyed the marriage because he was always offshore and would come back only about 3 to 4 times a year. This wasn't convenient for me because I never loved him initially. Our marriage was that of convenience. He never thought for once I had a problem with his job because I never complained. So he continued and for him, he never really had marriage as a priority. What he never knew was that I never broke up with my boyfriend, whom my parents never approved of before giving me away to him.
My husband's continued absence was my greatest joy because that gave me and my boyfriend enough time to spend together. I got pregnant for my boyfriend mistakenly but couldn't abort it because of all the stories I heard about abortion. A part of me didn't want to remove the pregnancy because of my love for my boyfriend and I really didn't care if it broke the marriage up. So I decided to take my chances. Coincidentally, my husband came back around the time I missed my period, so I naturally hooked the pregnancy on him and which he gladly accepted without doubt.
When I saw how easily the 1st pregnancy went, I and my boyfriend decided to plan the pregnancies around the time my husband would come back. I did this for the next 3 pregnancies. The surprising thing is that all my kids look like me except the 5th one who looks like my husband.
My boyfriend got married by the time I had the 3rd pregnancy but that didn't stop our affair. One day, my husband finally made to work in the Lagos office and since he was going to be more at home, I broke up with my boyfriend. It took a while before I could adjust to the change and my husband. So by the time my husband had spent a full year, I got to know the real him and that is how I got pregnant for my last daughter. I have 3 boys and 2 girls (14yrs, 12yrs, 9yrs, 6yrs and 2yrs).
After 3 full years with my husband, I have grown to love him and I think he deserves the truth. But my kids will be devastated because all 4 of them think my husband is their true dad. I am not naturally a dishonest person and that's why I want to tell him but so much will be damaged.
Please help me make a decision, please.
*My goodness, blog reader! I don't know what to say but one thing I know for sure is that something as deep as this should not be kept a secret because one day it will come out! Your husband deserves to know the truth as well as your kids...and I hope for your sake, you have a job and where to live because *Deep Cough*...who knows what he might do but it is sure not a joke...*
Blog readers over to you...
Everyone loves it when people come together and share thoughts.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog, keep it up!
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ReplyDeletePls don't approve useless n deceitful comments like this on ur blog. Thank u
ReplyDeleteHmmm, this is serious problem oo.
ReplyDelete